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Andre: You make drug problems sound simplistic. They are not. And I think you know what he meant, no matter if she "brought it upon hersels" the people taking delight in the death of others make me feel sick right now. I'm not saying you are one of them, but one still seems a bit like an over-intellectual five-year-old when putting it that way in which you did.
@Andre, I was bewildered by the apparent callousness of some of the comments I'd seen, bordering on the vindictive - the 'I have no sympathy and don't care, she was an addict' type of thing. In some cases from people I had some respect for. Touched a raw nerve.
Callousness more like fact. Maybe Andre and others aren't treating it with the kid glove that her fans would appreciate.The only reason 99% know her was a song about refusing to get help and living with the consequences and these are the consequences. When you don't care other people tend not to care.
And I think the reason I've seen more from people about this than Norway is that people feel personally touched by music, but unless they know someone in Norway, there's a slight sense of detachment from the event.
I think there's a disconnect here in that it's hard for many people to conceptualize that someone indulging in all manner of excessive drug use may actually not enjoying themselves on the way down. A woman who completely reduces herself like that is living a tortuous existence.
ALSO: just because people are being sad about Amy Winehouse does not mean they can't be shocked and disgusted by the events in Norway. I for one have the capacity to feel many emotions about a myriad of subjects.
Those who’ve never struggled with drug dependency themselves, or loved anybody who has, will often dismiss the props more empathetic folks extend to the ex-junkie with caustic bon mots along the lines of “So he/she quit drugs? Big deal. Why celebrate someone for finally exhibiting common sense? They didn’t have to get hooked in the first place. It’s not like someone held a gun to their head and told them to try drugs.” Oftentimes, these are the same people who think being gay is a choice, too.But in the case of drug abusers, not every addict has the luxury of choosing a glamorous existence of despair, lies, theft and self-loathing. Some people are born genetically predisposed to chasing the dragon.
Let's be honest, drugs work and work damn well for stoping pain. Short term and there'll be hell to pay in side effects, but that's not the point.
I wonder if seeking fame/money is itself an attempt for some to banish their own personal demons? I imagine it must feel incredibly shitty to put in the work to become famous and then find out that it doesn't fix anything.
It's important to know when you've fucked up and who you've hurt in the process and what you stand to lose so it'll be easier not to do it again.
Your cigarette smoking allegory is not really appropriate or equivalent in this discussion. That's like saying you have a choice to be depressed, because if you wanted to, there is nothing keeping you from walking outside and being social with the world and smiling at children.
And addiction is no different.
It's not about wanting. It's not about choices. It's about constantly clamoring forward and still just sinking deeper in.
Was clinical depression the root of her doing drugs? An attempt at coping?
That's fails to take into account the fact that *everyone* has days when they wake up feeling like the world is gray and uninteresting, feeling hollow inside and like there's a gulf between them everyone else. Everyone has these feelings every once in a while. But depressed people like you or I feel like that so often it's part of our personality, so much that we have to work around it, and to such a degree that we'll have to bear its scars for the rest of our lives, even if we've successfully gotten treated.
If it didn't ALSO include disposition then everyone who ever drank a beer or tried a puff would be screwed. Only a fraction of people who try a drug get addicted - the size of the fraction depends on the insidiousness of the drug, it's true, but the point is not everyone gets hooked. And when you're partying and you see other people try it and walk away unscathed rolling the dice doesn't seem like that big of a deal.
You're making it sound like if only Amy Winehouse had just said "no" the very first time, like Nancy Reagan said to, it all would have been hunky dorry. That's a stunning lack of appreciation for the pervasiveness of drugs, the monstrously desperate mentality that seeks any release from the demands of life and finally how completely drug addiction overwrites someone's mind and motives. By the time a drug addict is really in the throes of addiction every single action and choice is made to support their addiction, period. Choice is an illusion for anyone who can't think past getting her next fix.
I think this is the first thread I've seen where Andre was actually unpopular.
And that's it, really. To be quite a few addicts, not all, but quite a few, don't even think there's a problem and I think Winehouse was of that mentality.
Depression might just come at you. Perhaps for a clear reason, perhaps not, but it sinks its hooks into you in a manner that I see as different from becoming hooked to a drug.