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Music: THE SQUAREST BANDS ALIVE???

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      CommentAuthorBeamish
    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2011
     (10140.1)
    MIghty, you may want to look away.

    I just saw a commercial for the Journey/Foreigner/Night Ranger tour.
  2.  (10140.2)
    So glad Keyofsilence mentioned, Kraftwerk, I couldn't believe you guys had missed them, they are the definition of square.
    Also, as great as the music is I have to add Propaghandi. I love them but.... yeah.

    Green Day get honourable mention as they are just mind numbingly dull. Plus, I still have major issues with a band that dares to call itself punk and then sells the merch for their 3-year late "anti-war" album through Claire's #@!$ing Accessories! ... Anti-flag had a song up within a few weeks - THREE DAMN YEARS!!!

    I feel calmer now and I apologise for the irrelevance of that last part to the actual post. They just make me...
    Yeah, I need to go lie down now.
  3.  (10140.3)
    weezer - terrible songs and for some reason constantly get hyped whenever a new album comes out and only mange about two listenable tracks per album
    U2 - no reason needed it's pretty clear
    white lies - i'm very bored of all these 1980's revival smiths worshipping boring indie bands
    coldplay - cure for insomnia
    kings of leon - it's dangerous in the middle of the road
    pearl jam - careerists, that disappered up their own ass
    rage against the machine - never liked their we're anti corporate but here's an album of cover versions and a live album and a boxset
    metallica - the definition of hypocracy
    black veil brides - i thought these were a joke meme at first then realised they're the product of a hot topic focus group
    green day - suddenly became political, where was this angry political streak on nimrod and dookie
    foo fighters - dave grohl's massive ego has taken over
    • CommentAuthorlucialima
    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2011
     (10140.4)
    The Kelly Family
    Hanson?
  5.  (10140.5)
    black veil brides - i thought these were a joke meme at first then realised they're the product of a hot topic focus group


    i was at the merch booth with MENZINGERS last week, and they gave me their all access pass to ' go around the corner and watch this shit. its insane!'

    i watched them come on and posture and play for about a minute before i couldnt take it. since it was my first exposure to them, i am pretty sure my mouth was actually agape.

    WHAT

    THE

    FUCK

    and definitely second Foo Fighters- while i have no problem with them musically (and i am glad when huge bands do what they are SUPPOSED to do on tour, and that is take out smaller bands they like to help get the word out, rather than just whoever their label is trying to market to their fanbase), they are the poster child for 'That Band That Old Guys Think Rocks SOOO HARD'
    •  
      CommentAuthorhmobius
    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2011
     (10140.6)
    Someone pointed out to me not so long ago that there are very few bands beginning with K that are anything other than pap. I might plead for Kvelertak's reprieve but as for the rest - Korn, Keane, Kaiser Chiefs, Kasabian, etc. All dreadful... naysayers may plead their case
  7.  (10140.7)
    KUNG FU RICK
    KILL THE MAN WHO QUESTIONS
    KILLERS (the grind one w ex- CHARLES BRONSON members, obviously not the other one)
    KITE-EATING TREE
    KILL THE CLIENT
    KILLING THE DREAM
    KYLESA


    just off the top of my head...
  8.  (10140.8)
    So many of those Ks were integrated into my CD collection after me and my partner started living together... just seeing Kyuss and Kinski next to Killers, Kasabian and Keane makes me want to weep. There's also a Maroon 5 album in there somewhere, unless I made a point of sacrificing it to the elder gods.
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      CommentAuthorinfomancer
    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2011
     (10140.9)
    I'd add these to Joe's list of K's that don't suck:

    Krallice
    KMFDM (well, the earlier records, anyway)
    Katatonia
    Killing Joke
    Kyuss

    So as not to completely threadjack, I've often thought that the radio-based "hard rock" bands of the 80's would be pretty square. REO Speedwagon, Foreigner, Night Ranger, etc. They clearly lacked the sexuality (and drugs) of bands like Motley Crue, and I can easily picture them having a nice cup of tea before bed at eleven on the tour bus.
    • CommentAuthorradian
    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2011
     (10140.10)
    ...and Khanate are a good K-
  11.  (10140.11)
    Bruce Shitestain?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K77mre-YhvE&feature=feedlik

    Come on - he takes being square all the way around to the other end.
  12.  (10140.12)
    Yeah, I would call that fuckin sexy
    • CommentAuthoricelandbob
    • CommentTimeAug 12th 2011
     (10140.13)
    James Blunt

    Yeah, he may have been in the army and that he has a pad in Ibiza apparently being the party animal. But the fact that all of this needs to be brought up IN EVERY SINGLE INTERVIEW HE HAS EVER DONE to convince us that he is "cool and groovy" immediately marks him out as square.

    I don't even need to talk about the music.

    And Brian May. Man's a bloody Astrophysicist... and not in a cool way.
  14.  (10140.14)
    Someone already mentioned all nu-metal bands after 1998, but I really do feel that Papa Roach deserve an extra-special mention. Their material goes out of the way to achieve the emotional immaturity of their listeners. I believe this is so they can maintain a perpetually teenage/moronic audience, because a stupid audience is better than no audience at all.

    Here are some lyrics tailored especially towards the angsty teenager in all of us:

    I know my father loves me
    But does my father even care
    If I'm sad or I'm angry
    You were never ever there

    Suck it up you fucking square.
    • CommentAuthoradrian r
    • CommentTimeAug 13th 2011
     (10140.15)
    I'm guessing the idea that even thinking of something as square kind of marks you out as square for using such a square term is lost on most of the posters on this thread...But go on, tell the world about the angularity of those other bands, and relax in the comfort that your own tastes are sacrosanct...

    youdothatvoodoo -- deviating from the norm since 2007
  16.  (10140.16)
    thanks

    just know we are all perfect and that nothing i like is bad. also please tell of us of anyone you know that makes sure to state they deviate from the norm.
  17.  (10140.17)
    You can't criticize criticism without being a critic. Which makes neither action invalid.

    Those who have posted here may have done so with or without awareness that it's square to talk about music. But no one plays blogs-on-tape of music reviews on the radio. Music is played on the radio. So it invites interest. Talking about the squareness of music has value if not much truth, and talking about the squareness of criticism has useless truth.
  18.  (10140.18)
    Steve Vai, Joe Satriani. Two massive squares who would probably still be virgins if they didn't play guitar so unbelievably well.

    As a side note both of them were formative musicians in my incredibly square teenage years of wanting to shred as quickly as possible.
    • CommentAuthoradrian r
    • CommentTimeAug 14th 2011
     (10140.19)
    Isn't there something a bit sad about casting stones rather than being celebratory?

    youdothatvoodoo -- there's a lot of good shit out there
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      CommentAuthorAlastair
    • CommentTimeAug 14th 2011
     (10140.20)
    not in a thread which entire point is to talk about square bands.....

    also i like james taylor....


    also, smashing pumpkins (well billy corgan)

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