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Music: THE SQUAREST BANDS ALIVE???

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    • CommentAuthoricelandbob
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011 edited
     (10140.1)
    ok i have been "advised" to place this on here by Oldhat to get your feedback and start generating a barrel of hateful spite and bile to power Super Si Spurrier's future endeavours....

    A piece on today's Flavourwire....

    The Squarest Rock Acts of All Time

    Essentially, it looks at the boring, dull and overtly earnest rock and pop acts whose heads we would like to stove in with a rusty shovel. If you don't fancy reading it, the list is...

    James Taylor
    The Eagles
    Sting
    Hall and Oates
    Coldplay
    Matchbox 20
    Hootie and the Blowfish
    Phil Collins
    Huey Lewis and the News
    Bryan Adams

    but we know this list of musical gruel and tofu is not complete. WHO else should be on this list... and why??
  2.  (10140.2)
    U2... I cannot believe U2 are not on there.
    •  
      CommentAuthorrickiep00h
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011 edited
     (10140.3)
    While I will silently acquiesce to U2, you bastards keep your hands off Radiohead.

    Also my picks are Arcade Fire and any nu-metal band after about 1998.
    •  
      CommentAuthorsneak046
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.4)
    Four non blondes.
  5.  (10140.5)
    Radiohead... totally... (Runs away fast).
    •  
      CommentAuthoroldhat
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.6)
    Styx, Creed, Nickelback, Missed Orleans, Saga...
    •  
      CommentAuthorJehrot
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.7)
    Latter day kings of leon give me the staving-twitch.
    •  
      CommentAuthorrickiep00h
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.8)
    I say this as a full-on fan of their music, but Metallica. They've been trying way too fucking hard for the past decade or so, but Some Kind of Monster really hammered home how completely not-cool they are now. (That said I really like about 2/3 of Death Magnetic and I'm really looking forward to the new album.)
    • CommentAuthoricelandbob
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011 edited
     (10140.9)
    remember we are talking about the squarest, not necessarily the one with the most boring music.

    Example - Bryan Adams. He does do a LOT of charity work, but he is a strict vegan and is teetotoal. the militancy of that teetotalism came into force when he moved to London, nearby a local pub. He didn't like the rowdiness of said pub, so he bought it... so he could shut it down and make his house bigger...

    Now THAT'S square!
    •  
      CommentAuthorinfomancer
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.10)
    Boring adult contemporary radio pap.

    Maroon 5
    The Strokes
    Dave Matthews
    Train
    Creed
    Jack Johnson
    James Blunt
    David Gray
    Jason Mraz
    Fallout Boy
    The Killers

    This is probably all old stuff that isn't on the radio anymore, but it was all big when I used to work in places that played it nonstop. I feel sick at the memory.
    •  
      CommentAuthorrickiep00h
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.11)
    Well, Bob, there is this:



    Look at James. Look at him.
  12.  (10140.12)
    look at the expression of Robert Trujillo. "I thought it was going to be cool to be in Metallica...this isn't metal! What have I done?".

    No one mentioned Mike and the Mechanics, or Mr. Mister yet.
    • CommentAuthorrichwilson
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.13)
    Arcade Fire must go on the list, without doubt. Bilge.

    I'd add:
    Crowded House
    INXS
    Elbow
    Ellie Goulding
    Damien Rice

    Good shout with Metallica. How the mighty have fallen. That said, I'll still look out for the new record.
    •  
      CommentAuthorAlan Tyson
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011 edited
     (10140.14)
    I think the rule is, once you've gotten more than a consecutive hour of airtime on a Cumulus radio station, and this happens less than ten years after the formation of your band, you're pretty much doomed.

    Which is too bad, really - every time the radio comes on (usually while I'm switching CDs) and I hear a song I like, I have to frown and go "oh, man, I'm gonna be sick of that in two months."

    Then again, this rule isn't universal. I'm kind of glad that I can still say the name Janelle Monae or The Hush Sound and still have people give me a "huh?" look.

    In regards to Metallica - considering how long they've been around, I'm amazed they're still together and making music. A lot of it's hit or miss, but the glory of the download age is that I can ignore the misses and just nab the hits - I only own three songs off Death Magnetic, but I played the fuck out of those three songs for about six weeks after I got them.
    •  
      CommentAuthoroldhat
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.15)
    Korn. Modern day Korn. Which, yes, was reformed.
    •  
      CommentAuthorAlan Tyson
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.16)
    Man, Korn... I remember when I was a kid, and liking a song called "Freak on a Leash" made me a sex-maniac weirdo as far as all the other kids at school were concerned. I'll always love them for that.
    • CommentAuthoricelandbob
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.17)
    what about KEANEEEEEE?
  18.  (10140.18)
    Strokes don't meet the 'overtly earnest' aspect of our definition here,

    also WHATEVER, YOU'RE SQUARE, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ME AT ALL

    I would add to the list Midnight Oil
    •  
      CommentAuthorsneak046
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.19)
    Manic Street Preachers - burst onto the scene all dress-wearing and eyeliner and arm-cutting, quickly to turn in yet another MOR stadium rock outfit. Tho I doubt I've knowingly heard anything of theirs since the 90's.
    • CommentAuthorDC
    • CommentTimeAug 11th 2011
     (10140.20)
    Tokio Hotel? xD

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