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    • CommentAuthorPooka
    • CommentTimeOct 25th 2011
     (10297.21)
    I had an interesting weekend. I got invited to the "bootleg preimere" of Truth or Dare IV: Deadly Dares at the historic KY theater. Tim Ritter got a bunch of the local actor folk to participate so I spent the evening watching a bunch of my friends and aquaintances killing each other. My business partner played three different masked killers, and got to keep one of the masks :). I got to hang out with the director who wants to shoot the non fiction ufo documentary (he got to electrocute someone in a hottub hehe). He's just the nicest fellow, with a quirky but clever sense of humor, and I'm glad I got to know him.
    So until about three months ago I owned part of a comic book store here in lexington. We got tired of our stupid business partners so we sold our share and are in the process of starting an online collectibles store. We mostly deal in eighties toys and expensive comic books. The day after the event I set up at my second convention this year, but ended up not making any money. My merch didn't really fit with the theme of the show (but I got a deal on tables so I went anyway, just for the hell of it...nothing lost but time really). I did get to hang out with an awesome wolf who was stationed outside my door. He was the mascot for a wildlife conservation organization! I also got to meet a few more local artists (and an awesome german chick who was working on her docterate for some sort of water related degree. She had a booth selling her brother's faery based artwork), and that's always a good thing.

    I've got a project to keep me occupied though. I have this elaborate tattoo design project I'm doing for my business partner. The art is simple, but the layout is very complex, and will take all my creativity and skill to make it work. My hands aren't as skilled as they once were, not even by a tenth, but I can still do this. Slowly, and painfully, but I'll make it work, and the real task is figuring out the symbology and placement...woot. I feel all creative.


    This is me being sad, and discouraged though...
    my art show location never got back to me for scheduling, so I'm back to square one again...sigh
    It seems like everytime I start to relax and start to feel like I'm finding my place and my pace something comes along to fuck it all up. I'll have to push my show back by a couple months most likely, so I'm going to miss the whole christmas buying rush I was banking on. This is so very frustrating...all I want to do is make money for the bar, my business partners, and myself...and I can do it if they'll give me a chance. Maybe it's the band I have...kinda a rap/crunkcore/experimental group that works with one of my business partners. I'd hate to drop them though...It would make me feel like an ass.

    One more positive note. I might be working with a local celtic/folk singer. I want to try my hand at singing, and he said he'd love to hear me and maybe work with me. Woot. :) fun fun.
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      CommentAuthormister hex
    • CommentTimeOct 25th 2011
     (10297.22)
    Let's see if I remember how to do one of these ...

    Strange times recently. Health problems that scare the shit out of me and then just go away. Still no job but creatively, things keep getting better and better. As of November, I will have been celibate for six years. So I either really need to get laid or never bother with it ever again.

    I've been smoking a lot more lately, almost two packs a day. I'll quit when I'm up to two LIGHTERS a day. And not before.
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      CommentAuthorFauxhammer
    • CommentTimeOct 25th 2011
     (10297.23)
    I don't know which is kicking my ass worse: fear of success, or the idea that my fear of success is like a fear of unicorns; it's unlikely to ever come up in any practical sense, so don't worry about it.

    I still keep going, though. I'm kind of robotic in that sense.
  1.  (10297.24)
    @Rachael: :( Flowers and ice cream. Srsly.
  2.  (10297.25)
    @ RandomEntity - Thanks for the House. When my roommate got home, all I said was "House was wrong" to which he replied "You've got Lupus?!" Hah.

    @ Roadscum - I really hope you are right. I'd really rather have some kind of infestation that I'd have a chance of eradicating than just further confirm how much my body hates itself. And that suggestion is WAAAY better than random friend of my mom's from 25 years ago writing to me on Facebook: "I had symptoms of Lupus & Sjorns. But it turned out to be something else. I finally was diagnosed with Myelodisplastic Syndrome. My bone marrow was producing bad cells, I had to have a bone marrow transplant. I take my meds and I am fine now." Yessirree, I'm hoping for organ worms.

    @DavidLejeune - And here's the kicker. So, I'd recently been all happy to think that the reason things went bad with the fellow I miss terribly was because of the brain swelling from Lyme. Everything was fine between us for so long, but every time things get bad, and I start sobbing and freaking, there's also the BRAIN SWELLING! So it's my health that's causing it! Not him! .... But it's probably NOT Lyme, and probably never was. And Lupus appears and flares from EXTREME emotional/life/health stress. So what suddenly brought on the brain swelling that won't go away? Well, it started ... right when I got my heart broken and everything I thought we were to each other was suddenly a lie and I had nothing and nobody to hang on to. Aaaaand the brain swelling won't stop. And I still miss him every day. And it's been two years. So maybe I am just fixated and crazy, but christ, I don't know what to do. I'm at the point of just asking him to go to therapy with me so I can get some fucking closure and understand what the fuck happened to I can move on and not have my health suffer from a broken heart.
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      CommentAuthorbrittanica
    • CommentTimeOct 26th 2011
     (10297.26)
    It's always something. We have negative 38 dollars until this evening, when I get my 32-fucking-hour paycheck, after which we'll probably have about 200 dollars (plus whatever the fella gets paid the next day). The fella's tire has gone flat, which costs 139 dollars to replace. And I'm trying to not even think about the past due bills, the rent that's coming up in a week, the bills that are due now, the gas I burn through because I need an oil change which I can't afford now...
    Bright side, I went to my parents' farm yesterday. They planted about an acre of strawberries last month, and have already gotten 10 gallons of berries from them. So I came home w/ a tub of really ripe strawberries I picked myself. The novelty of getting them in October is almost better than the berries themselves. And they bought me more groceries than we could afford in a month. I feel so so bad, because I know they are struggling. Dad just stopped working again (he was in construction) to spend more time on the farm. They're wanting to open as a pick-your-own next Spring. They have equipment to buy, a professional kitchen and toilet facilities to build, plants to buy and transplant and take care of, loans to pay back, and I know they can't be making THAT much off my mom's job at the hospital's ER registration.
    I did talk to Dad over breakfast about my What-the-Fuck-Am-I-Doing-With-My-Life problems. And my dad, my pragmatic-as-fuck, never finished college, good ol' farm boy, Conservative Independent dad gave me his equivalent of a "chase your dreams" encouragement. "Whatever you want to do, you have to live it. You can talk about it, you can think about it, you can piddle w/ it, but at some point... You just have to go for it." It meant so much. I always have this deep fear of disappointing them; I know I don't, but I can't shake it. But it just seems like, now, we're all in the same boat, just trying to figure out our place. Mom and Dad are in their early-fifties. They started the berry farm 4 years ago. I can't help thinking they'd be happier if they'd started 10 years ago.
    I'm sitting here, crying, because I have no other place to vent. I feel like a burden and a downer trying to explain how frustrated I am to the fella, or to my parents, or just yelling into Twitter, even. I want something more than this. I want to be happy w/ my life. But at this point, it's hard to think that it'll ever be more than decorating cakes and resting at home from decorating cakes.
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      CommentAuthorrazrangel
    • CommentTimeOct 26th 2011
     (10297.27)
    Hmm Where has Flecky gone? I hope the bloke's alright and it's just noncompliant machines keeping him away.

    Yep, we notice. Good things and good health, good sir.
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      CommentAuthorallana
    • CommentTimeOct 26th 2011
     (10297.28)
    Okay angry rant!
    I need a new cellphone like nobody's business. Also I greatly dislike Rogers. So I went to Wind Mobile and asked to put a new phone on a tab and get this sweet $30/month deal they have on right now. This deal will be gone in a week, so time is of the essence.
    After three in-person store reps and two on the phone, I have FINALLY figured out what is going wrong in their weaselly computer system. I'm trying to register with my credit card (required for the tab) and their system is checking with Equifax Canada to verify my address and personal info. Not my credit card company or bank, not with any gov't agency, but with Equifax. With whom I have never spoken. Where they get their information is anyone's guess, but they are horribly out of date.
    After the first two in-store attempts (after which NOBODY told me why the mystery system was rejecting me) I finally got someone on the phone to tell me it's Equifax's problem. One more in-store attempt and I'm still being rejected. I find Equifax's Secret Customer Service Phone Number (no joke, they refuse to give it out directly) and get them to verify exactly which obsolete address they have on file. I call in to Wind one more time and they tell me I'll have to wait until Equifax creates my account and snail-mails me some documents (another week) before I can update my info with Equifax and THEN register with Wind.
    Who. Ever. Gave. Equifax. The. Right.
    Who. Ever. Hired. Such. Incompetent. Stooges. To. Work. Customer. Service. For. Wind.
    Why. Did. This. Take. So. Much. Work.
    Most importantly, why aren't these people doing everything in their power to take my money?

    I think I'm soured on all the new cellphone startups, now. Maybe Koodo has a good deal on a simple phone? Maybe Rogers can be conned into giving me a better rate since I've put up with their shit for almost five years now?
    Or, wait! I'll just go off-grid! That'll solve everything.
    • CommentAuthoricelandbob
    • CommentTimeOct 26th 2011
     (10297.29)
    @Allana

    It completely sucks. My mum for years had problems with the UK version of equifax as the people who lived in the address before her ran up a shitload of bills, but they always went by the address, "Oh we have that address down as blacklisted, sorry", "But that wasn't me! That was the previous tenants", "Sorry there's nothing i can do". It took her over 2 years to clear her home. And they went by snail-mail as well.

    Ironically it's easier here in Iceland. I can't get a loan, overdraft, credit card or any HP... because i'm not Icelandic and therefore untouchable. End of!
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      CommentAuthoroldhat
    • CommentTimeOct 26th 2011
     (10297.30)
    Okay, so...deciding to do my week thing early, because I don't think I'll have time otherwise.

    Things have been overall pretty good. I'm going to the gym and improving in areas that left me winded and wanting to vomit (ie ALL OF THE THINGS), still brewing beer, going back to making the odd post in Thirsty Wench, meeting new people with D&D Encounters and impressing them with being a newcomer and being able to play and I've started the nightly ritual of reading a bit of my book before bed, made easier with a lamp recently put on my nightstand.

    I've been offered two jobs in something I'm good at (one at photography, the other at pretending to be someone else in social media platforms) that will pay well and see me through until Christmas, I got my ears pierced, hair dyed to my original hair colour and bought a few articles of clothing that make me feel good. And while I still haven't taken any pictures in a while, I'm feeling the urge to pick up the camera coming back bit by bit.

    One good/bad thing is that I'm eating more (as opposed to the one meal a day that I normally have) but am eating junk. This has led to some obvious weight gain. Tomorrow when I get some time after finished some press releases, I'm going to write myself a few meal plans, but some more fruit/vegetables and work out something for when I'm finished at the gym (after a workout I get absolutely ravenous).

    So I guess that's good in that I have an idea of what to do.
  3.  (10297.31)
    Seriously, where is Flecky? Normally that guy posts in an almost neurotic fashion, all night long. I spend the night here, bored out of my mind on graveyard shift, and seeing Flecky's somewhat incongrous and scattered posts ironically keeps me relatively sane.
  4.  (10297.32)
    I, too, miss and worry about Flecky. Here's hoping he's the sort of person who suddenly had a windfall of awesome things happen to him, and the fun of his meat-space life is so consuming that loggin in here to vent just hasn't bothered to occur to him. That's what I'm wishing for him, at least.
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      CommentAuthorrazrangel
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011
     (10297.33)
    How would we find him? He's not in London, right?
    • CommentAuthorArgos
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011 edited
     (10297.34)
    "Flecky come hoooome!" Could just be a bout of not being on the internet for a bit, I know I tend to fall behind on keeping up with forums and message boards (even WC sometimes). So hopefully it's just that and nothing bad.
    • CommentAuthorArgos
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011
     (10297.35)
    So, remember my rant about the guy who gave me shit about losing weight? Apparently he's been congratulating another guy in our social circle for losing weight and getting fit. Double standards, much?

    But wait! There's more!

    Last night we had a "talk" over gchat, and he was apologizing because he said he realized that he had offended me, and he was sorry. And I tried to be all "Well, yeah but mostly I was just annoyed cos you weren't listening to what I was saying" and trying to be like "yeah you were a dick but I'm over it and it's okay, for real." And he replies how it was NOT okay and he "sinned" against me, but he's learning. And so I was all "dude, no really, it's okay." And he told me to stop, because the only way he can grow is to make the experience too painful for him not to.

    Anyway, I'm glad he learned a lesson, that's good, but I feel kind of weird at how self-flagellating he's being about the whole thing. I really wasn't THAT angry at him, nor was I hurt, I was just annoyed and offended that he was being hypocritical at me over fitness goals, and doing so just because I'm female. :/
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      CommentAuthoroldhat
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011
     (10297.36)
    Odd how you were annoyed that he wasn't listening to what you were saying and now he's not listening to you forgiving him.
    • CommentAuthorArgos
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011
     (10297.37)
    exactly!!!! I was just saying that to one of our mutual friends (who is PISSED at him over this). I think he thinks he hurt my self esteem or something, when that's not the issue here. The issue is that I'm pissed that he pulled a double standard on me over my sex - it's okay for him to want to build muscle and for our other guy friend to lose weight but it's not okay for me to want to lose weight because I want to define my muscles, which I've been strengthening all summer long.

    Dude needs to learn how to listen, and stop thinking that he knows what people are thinking and what's best for them.
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      CommentAuthoroldhat
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011
     (10297.38)
    Maybe he needs Glukkake, you and me to have a chat with him like we did with Templesmith. hahaha
    • CommentAuthoricelandbob
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011 edited
     (10297.39)
    Templesmith has never really been the Same after that "Chat" has he?
    • CommentAuthorArgos
    • CommentTimeOct 27th 2011 edited
     (10297.40)
    Yeah, I need to send Glukkake over to him to bop him on the nose about it.

    And, hahah, yeah. Poor Templesmith. I did think it funny that that "chat" came up not long after this other incident.