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    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011
    Really don't know why but this made me chuckle.

    Scientists question if wi-fi laptops can damage sperm
    Scientists are questioning if using wi-fi on a laptop to roam the internet could harm a man's fertility, after lab work suggested ejaculated sperm were significantly damaged after only four hours of exposure.
    The benchside tests showed sperm were less able to swim and had changes in the genetic code that they carry.
  1.  (10331.2)
    You know, I'm not interested in having any more kids, and I've been too cheap to get a vasectomy, so studies like this always get my interest.

    Like, "Oh, I should be using the laptop more often!"
  2.  (10331.3)
    @govspy: Remember to use the laptop actually on your lap while wearing Y-fronts for full effect.
    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011
      CommentAuthorDoc Ocassi
    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011
    @Ben: is there any other way?
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  4.  (10331.7)
    Miami's Federal Detention Center overrun with strippers posing as paralegals

    I've always thought there was an inordinate number of hot lawyers/legal aides...

    Multiple attorneys interviewed by Riptide say the FDC visitor rooms have been taken over by South American pole dancers posing as paralegals for wealthy drug lords inside.

    "They take off their tops and let the guys touch them," veteran defense attorney Hugo Rodriguez says. "The majority of these young, very attractive women are noncitizens brought in exclusively for the purposes of visiting the FDC. Any lawyer can sign a form and designate a legal assistant. There is no way of verifying it. The process is being abused."
    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011
    • CommentAuthorRenThing
    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011

    I have no sympathy for that guy if the bull gives him a sequel.
    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011


    I'd like to punch that guy in the nuts.
  5.  (10331.11)
    Queensland, Australia gets same-sex civil unions.

    In another news story I read it said that civil unions would be open to heterosexuals too. Obviously that makes sense, but I'd only ever been thinking about it in terms of gay rights. Seeing as I've said for a few years now that I would only get married when my gay friends could too, maybe I'll take it a step further (when the time is right) and go for a civil union.
    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011
    @Stoto, really? I'd like to perform an entirely different set of behaviours involving that man's testicles. Am I the only one who finds it downright sexy when people actually do a dangerous thing for its own sake? I think the word I'm looking for is... oh yeah, purpose. Dude found what he wants to do with his life, and by jove is gonna keep doin' it 'til it fucking kills him. That's just about as enviable as you can get.
    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011 edited

    I understand. Dean Potter is my personal hero.

    If he were fighting willing humans or robots, or putting his life on the line without killing animals, I would think he was cool. But I find it tremendously hard to admire matadors. With a lot of animal rights matters I'm on the fence, but bullfighting really pisses me off.
    • CommentTimeNov 30th 2011
    Hrm, I guess I can't argue; I just got a little weepy at those freed-from-a-testing-facility beagles on the other thread... I think, when it comes to bullfighting, I have that weird patronizing tolerance that comes from ethnocentrism.
  6.  (10331.15)
    bullfighting is very fair they always offer the bull a sword too, before it goes in the ring
    • CommentAuthorRenThing
    • CommentTimeDec 1st 2011
    Attorney suspended for one year after trying to hire "secretary with benefits.

    At some point, he thought this was a good idea.
    This man passed *law* school.
    • CommentTimeDec 1st 2011 edited
    About the bullfighting thing... yeah, let him go to the ring and let the bull finish the job.

    I eat meat, think hunting is a good thing ecologically and probably a fun hobby (was studying for my hunter's license when I was teen and going to get that some day) so I don't say this lightly: bullfighting is just torturing animals for someone's amusement and I fight it fucking disgusting. It's a nice thing that the bull wins now and then.

    If you want to do scary, dangerous and extreme stuff, go jump off airplanes or do some free climbing. I find that stuff downright sexy too. That's why me and the fiancé strap pressurized gas on our backs and crawl into shipwrecks, and have our holidays in radioactive cities.

    Relativism sucks and not every custom has to be accepted.

  7.  (10331.18)
    ?"Anti-piracy group BREIN is caught up in a huge copyright scandal in the Netherlands. A musician who composed a track for use at a local film festival later found it being used without permission in an anti-piracy campaign. He is now claiming at least a million euros for the unauthorized distribution of his work on DVDs. To make matters even worse, a board member of a royalty collection agency offered to to help the composer to recoup the money, but only if he received 33% of the loot."

    Copyright Corruption Scandal Surrounds Anti-Piracy Campaign
  8.  (10331.19)
    Bloke drives his Bugattu Veyron into a swamp on purpose as an insurance scam, gets filmed by car enthusiasts.

    • CommentAuthorWood
    • CommentTimeDec 1st 2011
    Man arrested at Large Hadron Collider claims he's from the future

    Mr Cole was seized by Swiss police after CERN security guards spotted him rooting around in bins. He explained that he was looking for fuel for his 'time machine power unit', a device that resembled a kitchen blender.

    Police said Mr Cole, who was wearing a bow tie and rather too much tweed for his age, would not reveal his country of origin. "Countries do not exist where I am from. The discovery of the Higgs boson led to limitless power, the elimination of poverty and Kit-Kats for everyone. It is a communist chocolate hellhole and I'm here to stop it ever happening."

    Professor Brian Cox, a CERN physicist and full-time rock'n'roll TV scientist, was sympathetic to Mr Cole. "Bless him, he sounds harmless enough. At least he didn't mention bloody black holes."