Whitechapel - SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-01T14:53:25-08:00

Tempted to jump the gun and call this one SPITuary, just because it sounds awesome.

Hipstamatic is a pretty neat app, but I can't seem to use it with the backwards camera so all my self-portrait attempts have questionable framing.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-01T17:07:05-08:00

I saved one for this month for once. I am getting clevererer. From yet another light test session in my home studio.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-01T19:50:22-08:00

Dodo dodo *wanders off* teehee I really HAD to... also for those who know what i'm talking about I have a web designer!!! :D :D :D trouble will commence January and take about 6months hehe

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-01T20:20:29-08:00

ComicBookBunny -- That's awesome! Good for you.
And the offer still stands if you need someone to help test it for bugs and what have you. E-mail address is in the profile.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-01T20:24:30-08:00

Danka much- i will have a big announcement when all is said and done and invite some to poke around at the site. :) I appreciate everyone's help and support for the whole thing!!
I pondered asking around for fetishes but that may open up one hell of a weird can of worms hahahaha ;)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-01T20:56:37-08:00

I want an invite please >__>

And yes, asking for fetishes opens up a HUGE can of worms. It's better to stick with whatever fetishes you'd think would be fun for a shoot (I did a play piercing thing once that was fun), but people will be asking for some really weird shit.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-01T23:12:36-08:00

@Bankara - I was going to ask in last month's SPIT, but... are your eyes different? From each other?

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T07:33:31-08:00

My friend was telling me I looked like a corrupt cop the other day with this thing. Might be time for it to go. One of my other friends says keep it though. I have absolutely no sense of self-style.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T07:40:29-08:00

@Rachael, in color no but in the size of my pupils, yes. My left eye lets in about a third stop more light, also coincidently it is my predominant eye. Most folks shoot with their right eye, I never really thought about it until someone asked which was my predominant eye and I didn't know. The answer was to lift a camera to my face and see which eye it naturally gravitated towards. In my case, the big left eye runs the show. Basically, this is me 0_o

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T07:49:03-08:00

@Sonny: Please both of them! Only shave one side of it off. (Please don't actually do this).

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T08:16:37-08:00

My furry wee pal has decided he is now a Shoulder Cat. He sits behind me on the couch and meows in my ear.

This is what he looks like from where I'm sitting:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T09:24:36-08:00

Taken last night, and this morning. The boyfriend and I finally got around to buzzing our heads after weeks of letting it grow out. I look like a fucking skinhead >_>

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T10:18:13-08:00

@Sonny, 1970's rogue cop mustaches are awesome. Go with it and remember to stare extra hard at people on public transportation and in bars with your flattest, most expressionless look.

@Argos, Ass? Embaddened! Damn, just... Damn. If I still had me hair I would rock this.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T10:54:51-08:00

How to be an instant badass: Shave yer head.

@Sonny, I second Bankara's suggestion to start extra hard at people.

Friendlier version of my buzz. Cheslea-esque:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T12:58:07-08:00

One of the things that I love about this place is that the chicks are all so bad ass, it makes me happy :)

I can not hope to equal the bad assness of Bunny's photo above, here I am attempting to look . . . "bad"

-Cara

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T14:17:31-08:00

And thus Rachael's fetishizing of Bankara reached new and previously unimaginable heights.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T15:14:33-08:00

@Argos: Now you are rocking nearly the same haircut as my lead character Roxy from BPM:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T15:59:10-08:00

oh sheeit Argos is teh real life Annie Archer :P

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T16:09:34-08:00

@Sizer, that is pretty damn much made of awesome.

@Argos, agreed. My perpetually shaved head has led (foolish, judgmental, pro-wrestling fan IQ level) people to instantly assume that I am some kind of neer-do-well thug who is going to rob them, kick their little doggies, and maybe have their babies for desert. Some of the times I find it amusing not to disabuse of this perception because i like to watch them squirm under my 'thousand-yard-stare-at-complete-strangers-on-the-subway'. I really do try to cultivate a habit of smiling in these situations but sometimes that has gone horribly awry. Nothing worse than trying to disarm someone with a smile and having them freak out instead.

@Rachael, aw yer makin' me blush!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T16:27:08-08:00

@ Argos Yes! i will gladly give you free access to my boobs! innuendos all around! teehee and you'd totally pull off tank girl!! <3
@thewaltonsare bad ass and as a whole most are startlingly attractive to boot. Intelligent eye candy for the win! I am SUCH a dirty old man sometimes, of this I am well aware.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T17:06:57-08:00

@Paul & Chris - Cosplay time!! Srsly though, that BPM image is RAD. That's actually how I usually have my hair if I don't feel like tying it up, I just sweep it all over onto the right side.

@Bankara -Strangely enough, I've found that a lot of people in my area have a thing for girls with mohawks. And when I had the synthetic dreads in my mohawk, even more so. People LOVED it. Some older guy on the bus who said he was a from Pakistan said my hair was "very becoming of me." I did think it would be cool to buzz all my hair off and leave just my little sideburn ding-a-lings, but a friend of mine said that when she had the Chelsea cut a few people here took her to be a racist skinhead.

@Bunny Huzzah!!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T18:32:53-08:00

Regarding shaved heads, five years ago or so, i'd been growing out my natural hair.

I was also living in Bed Stuy (a notoriously rough and 99% black neihborhood), and I got a lot of attitude. Often. Until I did this:

I, too, was afraid that I looked like a skinhead, but suddenly, people in my hood were much nicer to me.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T18:46:22-08:00

Rachel -- That black and white pic is pretty awesome.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T19:39:02-08:00

@Rach - you make it work, dear.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T20:38:29-08:00

@Rachael, not only was the haircut stunning, but GOSH, so is that photo! I would LOVE to shave my head at some point but i just like my hair too much. I admire your bravery! Doesn't hurt that the results were pretty awesome.

ALso: BED STUY DO OR DIE.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-02T22:52:30-08:00

@Bankara: I am also right handed and yet focus with my left eye when taking photographs, though I have figured that is because I can close my right eye and keep my left eye open, but not the other way around. I've never heard of anyone else who does that. I also write like I'm left handed (that hook type thing?) if I'm not careful. Do you do that? It would be kind of cool if you did.

@Argos & Rachael: Y'all really can rock the mohawk. Kickass!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T00:03:07-08:00

@Trini_naenae: I can only wink with my left eye, so my right eye is dominant, even though my right eye is the one that turns inward and had all the surgery.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T04:12:00-08:00

@Trini - I'm the same - can only focus with my left eye.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T11:01:42-08:00

ok struggling to get this huge gif to work anywhere, tell me if it does.

Had this netbook with its built-in-webcam 2 years this month. Trying to see how much I've changed in those two years.
Best/worst look?

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T11:33:05-08:00

@Atomic Sloth - You look fabulous with a beard, and I'm not a generally pro-beard person. Especially with the pea coat. You look very Tim Roth, and that's such a wonderful thing.

By the way, men, I've noticed, with the prevalence of beards in popular culture lately, that many men haven't been properly schooled in aesthetics and face management. Seriously. Think of the beard as serving a similar facial purpose as women wear blush. Accentuate the angular nature of your face, and follow the line of your cheekbone, and or jaw bone. The beard needn't rise all the way to your cheekbone, but it should follow the angle. If your beard scoops at a round angle, it will make your face look round. A straight line from the sideburn to the 'stache area will make you look more strong-jawed. Let atomicsloth show you the way!

vs

ok. beard ranting over. (its probably some wierd offshoot from my eyebrow grooming fixation. sorry.)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T12:28:17-08:00

This is technically from October I think (I don't know what happened to the time thing on my camera, as it thinks it was from January 2010), but since I just got the hospital bill this week, I figure it kind of counts. (Also, an excuse/incentive to upload and post recent photos of my uneven eyes.)

I went to the hospital because the brain swelling headaches were getting unbearable and I was just hoping theyd give me some antibiotics. They refused, and just gave me a crappy injection in my arm of some sort of NSAID, which really, that's just bullshit.

I started to feel.... wierd. In the thinky vision. More than usual. The way I tend to feel when I notice my eyes dilating wonky. It happens, sometimes more than othertimes. I asked the nurse. She said my eyes were fine. I took a photograph. She lied, of course. Though, to be fair, my eyes weren't as asymmetrical as they sometimes get.

Y'know, maybe I should take fewer ~~realistic~~ ~~knowingly hideous~~ unflattering self portraits. It's not a very good selling point for my photographic skills. "Please hire me, I'll make you look homeless and sickly!"

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T12:46:43-08:00

Walking to my car, in the parking structure. I am 6'3" and broad shouldered, when in my coat and hooded sweater. I like to think I am imposing, though no one who knows me would call me such.

Me, unable to concentrate, waiting for the plumber to arrive and tell me what's happening with my house's plumbing.

Nothing too terribly interesting, I"m afraid. Though seeing older pictures get bumped off my now-not-a-pro flickr account has reminded me to try and migrate over to picasa. . .

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T13:28:56-08:00

Had my hair cut, it was getting unmanageable. I think I need to tell these people 'don't make it too neat'. The guy put the side parting in a totally daft place, when I looked at it on Tuesday night I looked like a fucking bearded Hitler. Which had to change. Don't think it's too bad now, just needs to grow a bit shaggier.

@Rachael, Argos - could never shave my head, face is too round. I did have a grade 4 cut all over once and I looked like Alexei Sayle, which was truly awful and will never, ever happen again.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T14:34:17-08:00

@Rachael, Damn I love that B&W photo! Fucking awesome! Also, I never got the beard lesson so I have had to figure the whole thing out for myself. Tomorrow I am going to enlist the aid of a professional and go to one of them fancy man barbershops and get a proper trim and shaping. I have a really important gig coming up this week and I want to look my best but I honestly almost never consider my appearance otherwise. Like I said in my previous rant, I tend to consider people who judge me based on my appearance as being beneath my contempt. I suppose I invite it though because I enjoy overturning peoples prejudices when they discover that I am intelligent, well spoken, and sympathetic.
Also, I am putting "Please hire me, I'll make you look homeless and sickly!" on my business cards. I fucking laughed out loud and I think most people would upon seeing that in print.

@Trini, my handwriting looks more like a five years olds than a lefty, unless maybe the kids got the jimmy hands. Too much time spent in a city covered in grafitti growing up left a typographical bias that will last the rest of my days. Also, I can't open my right eye when I am shooting because the camera blocks it. This is supposed to be one of the reason why they are designed to be right eye machines, so you can still see in low light conditions. Glad to know I am among good company for using the gear without ever reading the manual!

@Atomic_Sloth, looks good, man! We need more giffery around here.

@Argos, I tried rocking the sideburns on a shaved head look for a bit when I was living in Paris and I was in a dive rock bar in the 11th Arr. and the guy ordering a pint next to me just stared at me while we waited in the crush of kids to to order. Finally, i stared back and said "Quoi?" and he basically said " your hairstyle is... (long pause) very interesting." with this shitbird superior smirk on his face. I got a lot of shit for my style from the Parisians and I was used to it, they were disgusted by me until explained I was from New York and then they would usually forgive my trespasses because they love NYC but this was the one time where someone was unmoved by my explanation. Shaved it all off that night when I got home, started growing the beard, never looked back.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-03T14:58:10-08:00

Since we're on the hair theme this month, I finally got mine cut (haven't cut it since June, iirc). It went from a passable Matt Smith Doctor on Halloween to nigh post-Return of Superman Supermullet on Thanksgiving, so it had to go.

Before:

After:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T04:26:49-08:00

Another shot from October. You can just make out the fucking bruise on my arm from the pointless injection they gave me in the hospital from many days prior:

@Bankara - your beard is lovely as it is, but I'm sure you'll look dashing. I am considering going the other direction as you were mentioning. I imagine that it'd be fun to look completely vanilla and proper (sort of like the above image, only you cant see the electric blue tights and stompy boots) so that I could surprise people when they discover I've had a mohawk, or worked at a harley shop, drink whiskey neat, take weird naked photos, etc etc...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T07:26:04-08:00

O_O

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T08:41:43-08:00

@everyone

You are all horribly sexy. If anyone says otherwise I will punch them square in the mandible and bid them goodnight.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T10:45:32-08:00

@Rachael - for my last class at uni, I had to do an oral presentation and dress professional for it. I actually have enough hair on my mohawk strip that I can side-part it and fix it up to look like I have normal hair. Totally surprised the whole class at the end when I was done and I pulled up my hair to reveal a mohawk, though how they all forgot I had a mohawk to begin with, I'm not sure.

Mohawk in disguise, taken just now (a bit disheveled, but you get the point).

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T12:30:52-08:00

@Alastair - I'm assuming that look is for Terry Pratchett? I now have my first edition copy of Good Omens signed (kinda) by both Gaiman and Pratchett. Booyah.

@Argos - The first time I shaved my head when I was 17, it was just half, so I could part it on the other side and hide it from my folks. It worked for no more than a week, when I absentmindedly shifted my hair while doing homework, and my stepmother caught me.

How Delirium can you get?

Ok, I've just posted enough to make up for my months of non-posting, methinks.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T12:39:03-08:00

I'm now convinced that my eyes are turning on me. The one on the viewer's left is turning green. Even surrounded by all the blue, I can still see it.

Also, I'm trying to make my hair grow through sheer force of will. Having it cut up above my shoulders after years of it being mid-back or longer is disturbing to me. Like someone stole my mojo.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T13:10:36-08:00

Haha... now, thanks to ya'll, I have a shaved head to go along with the stache. Excelsior!! (Pic likely to come)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T19:10:02-08:00

@Bankara: I'm not a big fan of facial hair and I think you do beards ok. Well, you're quite good looking to start with, but your beard tends to be well managed in your self portraits. Also, it's not my handwriting that looks like a lefty, it's what I look like when I'm writing, if that makes sense? It's actually really bad wrist posture, so I have to work on not doing that.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-04T21:48:27-08:00

Me, believe it or not, 17 years ago.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-05T02:04:13-08:00

I shaved the back of my head quite blindly the other night. People cannot stop running their fingertips along my nape and grabbing the tufts of hair at the crown and I am in a state of bliss.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-05T21:34:56-08:00

Is it not the best feeling in the world? When I first got my mohawk a few years back my first thought was "Why didn't I do this before!? It's AMAZING!" My mother said boys wouldn't like me anymore because they like long hair - boy was she wrong. It got me more boys rubbing my head than I could ask for.

Anywho, I crocheted a hat because my shaved head was cold the other day. This is the first hat I've made without following a pattern, just measured my head and went forth, so I'm pretty proud of that. I really like the colors in this yarn.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-05T22:42:40-08:00

Be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and
some have greatness thrust upon 'em...

renaissancing the hell out of an empty lot in 1996.

@Argos I covet that hat. I covet it.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-05T23:07:57-08:00

@Argos
Add a bit of neon and you could be in Tron 3...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T03:31:39-08:00

Here's the little bugger that keeps making a mess of my flat. Not a potted plant or ashtray is safe from his destructive urges.
Self portrait because you can see my legs.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T09:33:38-08:00

@oddbill--sweet Lute Suit, man.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T10:10:58-08:00

Okay, digging up an old theme:

Will

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T10:37:34-08:00

GREENTHEME

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T11:11:03-08:00

The wonders of having fluorescent and incandescent bulbs fitted. Fuck you, white balance!

At least it's better than the blue colour that my pasty skin actually is...

Will

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T15:18:06-08:00

This month I will be mostly modelling the "Hey, I got sacked and can't be bothered" look. Today I did actually get dressed though.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T15:46:13-08:00

On Whitechapel, no one knows if you are wearing pants.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T15:56:23-08:00

new theme - sans pants

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T16:05:14-08:00

But anyone could just say they're not wearing pants.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T16:08:47-08:00

@steadyup
the old adage "pics or it didn't happen."

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T16:11:33-08:00

To wit:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-06T22:30:49-08:00

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T01:42:31-08:00

Pants? Nope.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T02:35:48-08:00

Take it on faith, Chapeleros, that I am usually wearing pants.

Not now, but usually.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T04:38:24-08:00

Teehee I can totally post photos of me not wearing pants *evil grin* I do have a lot of them after all ;)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T05:13:24-08:00

Teehee I can totally post photos of me not wearing pants *evil grin* I do have a lot of them after all ;)

Yeah, you do that, young lady, and watch this place implode! : )

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T05:21:18-08:00

I'm just having flashbacks to forkfork...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T05:38:33-08:00

*shudder*

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T09:09:30-08:00

Well, I'm gonna mash-up this whole "photos from the past" thing we have going on with the pants-less deal.

This is early 2009. Not a self-portrait, though.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T09:10:25-08:00

Hooraaaaay!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T09:15:56-08:00

You really can't play chicken in whitechapel, it just doesn't work.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T09:17:23-08:00

The flashbacks... they're fading!

Hooray!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T11:33:09-08:00

Hooray!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T11:57:08-08:00

Good lawd! Argos beat ComicBookBunny to the pant-less photo!
If this pants-less trend continues, Argos' picture might have to be the balm for damaged eyeballs.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T16:12:11-08:00

Hooray!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T17:10:40-08:00

Right, no way in HELL am I releasing any past photos (I don't think I even have any...I was good at making sure my picture was never taken) and I won't even attempt to follow up Argos and eventually comicbookbunny's act with pantsless pics.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T17:43:22-08:00

*Opens SPIT at work, sees nude, scrolls past quickly thinking 'new joanneleah pic,' brain registers additional details, 'waitaminnit' scrolls back up, drops jaw on floor*

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T17:56:13-08:00

I nominate myself for not baring all on Whitechapel.

Will

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T18:34:13-08:00

Wow!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T19:26:00-08:00

@Argos - I'm not ashamed to admit that my very first self-portrait here was every bit as clothes-less as yours, alas, it is no longer lying around my computer. I do have one old one, though, that is technically devoid of pants:

Pants? Nope. Teensy bit racist? Maybe.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-07T22:07:52-08:00

Must... not... participate...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-08T09:21:19-08:00

i was running away from a bouncer and i leapt over a barrier that here was waaaaaay further down on the other side....

i am broken now....

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-08T09:23:48-08:00

ouch!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-08T10:12:59-08:00

yeah... to be fair if he had caught me it could have been a fuckload worse. so barely being able to walk makes up for being able to breathe

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-08T10:27:39-08:00

sounds like a fair trade

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-08T15:22:09-08:00

Hot damn... but yeah, better than the alternative, I guess.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-08T19:51:32-08:00

Well, I am wearing pants. Crazy old man sweatpants.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-08T20:47:39-08:00

NO PANTS:

... but yes bathing suit. And photo-bombing sister.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-09T02:07:13-08:00

@Argos: Not. Helping. Argos. Crush. Dammit!

No Pants Fish!
*gone*

(yes, it's a selfie. hooray for timers and remote shutter releases)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-09T04:09:37-08:00

These are my antenna, they beam messages from the PANDA GODS direct into my brainmeats

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-09T07:51:50-08:00

Hooray more girls in no pants!

@smileyfish: LOVE that picture!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-09T13:07:17-08:00

totally not wearing pants!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-09T13:17:55-08:00

Nice sporran, man.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-09T13:45:02-08:00

Sorry this is so fuzzy (lousy no Flash iPhone image) but here's BOTH my wife and I with no pants at her company X-Mas party. I was her arm-candy! : )

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-09T16:06:37-08:00

@fauxhammer i think i'm the oly person to pair a frank zappa t with a kilt...

@sizer, i think the candy works both ways there....

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-10T07:02:30-08:00

It's winter...

I am, of course, naked underneath all my clothes.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-10T14:54:46-08:00

Bearded and pantless.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-10T15:30:31-08:00

Bearded and pantless.

(sigh) AGAIN?

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-10T15:39:46-08:00

Someone needs to make yarn-beard underwear.

For the winter.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-10T16:47:04-08:00

This past Wednesday. Pantsless.

and so fucking freezing by the end of the night.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T13:24:38-08:00

A couple of weeks ago I went swimming, and had some kind of massive reaction to the chlorine in the water, or something. My eyes went totally red and the skin around them dried out badly enough to break, and the rest of the face didn't feel much better. Now I've been looking like a garden gnome who has smoked a massive blunt after drinking for two weeks and falling face first on asphalt.

And yeah, incidentally I had to do an interview looking like this. In fucking full HD.

Aaaargh my eyes feel so itchy I'd like to take a cheese grater on them.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T13:38:15-08:00

Okay, so as a public school teacher I can't do no pants, but I offer obscene family cuteness and geeky Christmas tree!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T14:06:56-08:00

No pants? Ladies and gentlemen, try to control yourselves when you feast your eyes on this exhibit from the Vintage Vornaskotti archives, from a few years back:

Yes, I have this condition - whenever I see a camera, I make a face.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T14:09:24-08:00

"I don't always see a camera, but when I do..." Vorn, you just might be the most interesting man in the world!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T14:27:38-08:00

@Vornaskotti - That is a glorious photo, sir.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T15:15:22-08:00

Oh wow, that is a glorious no pants photo. You win, sir.

Cara, fucking ADORABLE!!!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T15:21:29-08:00

And we have a winnah! This thread is now finished forever because the greatest self-portrait ever taken has been discovered.

...

Unless this becomes a caption thread.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T15:23:25-08:00

Cara, that is SUCH a charming family photo!! Seriously amazing.

@Vorn, ...

...

...

Just... Yes. Yes.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T15:41:55-08:00

Cara: great family shot! So cute!

Every time I see a spike in this thread, I think "Great; who's buck naked now?" Now I know...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T17:58:12-08:00

Vorn: "Oh, hi! Didn't see you there. Welcome to my palatial estate. Get naked, make yourself comfortable."

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T19:41:55-08:00

Long time no post, but be assured that I have been faithfully stalking you all... err... following a few threads. I just HAD to congratulate Vorn on his photo that is so very full of WIN.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T19:44:31-08:00

I've been looking through old pictures anyways, but haven't seen a single pantsless picture yet. Not my style, it seems. Plenty of tits though.

Another reject from posing with my freshly-blooming flowers:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-11T20:17:33-08:00

And I thought for sure that this thread was going to be called "Merry SPITmas".

For context on the DVD cover, see the last few weeks of the "Draw Each Other" thread.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-12T00:06:28-08:00

@allana - that's pretty gorgeous.

Zoetica used to do this sort of thing, but of course, much better:

I think they need to mirror more, or else be of different body locations. I'll try again later.

Someone else attempt an Ebbflected Diptych.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-12T01:22:52-08:00

Thank you, thank you! In all truthfulness, that's not a self-portrait but more of a very candid portrait taken in this one commune we lived in, where people had a habit of traipsing around naked post-sauna. :)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-13T08:08:21-08:00

@argos SQEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3 *ahem* I'll be over here....
@thewaltonsare fantastic cuteness!!

i have no pants, I have no pants, thank you! I have no pants.....

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-13T13:47:56-08:00

Dear Whitechapel,

It has been too long.
PhD is eating up most of my time, and side photography projects are chomping up what's left.

I didn't even know there was a pantsless theme, but now my sudden need to visit makes perfect sense.

XO

V

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-13T23:13:01-08:00

Hooray!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-14T05:08:19-08:00

AWWWWWWWWWW YEEEEAAAAAAAH

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-14T06:29:48-08:00

@Rachæl Tyrell - <3

@Alastair - I'm not actually sure that was for me, but I'm going to pretend it was anyhow. :)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-14T11:12:26-08:00

luckily for you all i have pants on, and it's a still from a video about dublin and digital media companies from CNN, always thought i'd get on the news as one of those neighbours interviewed when show shit happens and just doesn't know what to say.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-14T16:21:35-08:00

@V it was for both your return in presence and absurdly lovely pictures....

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-14T21:36:29-08:00

@Alastair - Well, then thank you ever so.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-14T23:26:13-08:00

Tattooless and pantsless, in days before I could afford either. I was forced to steal large shirts from others to cover my nakedness. This was when I was about 19 or 20.

....and then this was just this past summer.

Eh, I wasn't using my dignity anyway.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-15T02:16:06-08:00

That was some bigass hair, lady.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-15T02:24:37-08:00

Oh, it's been far, FAR bigger. High school was not kind. I posted a picture on Facebook last week of me from a high school dance, around 92 or so. Big, giant bangs, and blonde. Absolutely gloriously hideous.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-15T02:35:56-08:00

Did you say big blonde bangs?! Yeah, here's me getting ready for a 7th Grade dance.

(natural hair color, btw)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-15T10:02:41-08:00

Thank God no photographic evidence exists of my "Shave Wacky Designs Into The Side Of My Head" phase.

I looked like the product of putting Vanilla Ice in one Brundle Teleporter Pod, and John Candy in the other, and putting on the juice.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-15T16:39:00-08:00

@V-Stunningly delicious!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-15T17:44:36-08:00

@Fauxhammer Ah, the joys of being a young, white male in the 90's. I've got some side shaved head and neon green pants pictures somewhere. Probably in the same box where my original cassette tape of Vanilla Ice ended up.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-15T22:26:48-08:00

This is my "first day of the rest of your life" picture after submitting and moving back home and since my Golden Boy quote went unnoticed and I don't want to be the guy random guy yelling about "BRA'S". Bearded yes, pants less you bet I'm the only one home.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-16T06:17:33-08:00

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-16T22:11:29-08:00

Pantsless? Yes. I may or may not be also holding that hoodie closed for a reason. Heh.

Also, it's possible that I was slightly impaired...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T04:28:48-08:00

I may or may not have pants, but trousers and a hat I do have. One must maintain one's dignity. At least until it is vodka and absinthe time

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T06:13:43-08:00

Since we're doing pictures from the past, I give you: Phill_Sea, long black hair edition (Circa 1995)

going to my first prom.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T06:21:07-08:00

Haven't done one for ages, so:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T11:47:20-08:00

Old photos, you say... This is me age 18 years and one day, on the morning after my birthday, which happens to coincide with one of the biggest drinking holiday's in Finland. In this photo I'm sporting a black eye and a massive hangover - the birthday was suitably intensive. There was reckless driving through dark parks, the first thing that happened when we reached our destination, a fun fair, was that big ass paramedics and security guards bowled me out of the way, and gave me a nice view of a guy who had fallen from a ferris wheel and been scooped up into a stretcher, six guys jumped me and did their best to beat me up (all together they managed to give me that one slightly black eye, and that's it), and in the end of the evening I managed to casually and drunkenly stroll through a police cordon into a situation where someone was waving around a gun in front of the local police station. Good times, good times.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T12:24:22-08:00

On old photos this was me aged 13 with my Dad

and when I was 17 maybe?

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T12:35:28-08:00

@comicbookbunny: "i have no pants, I have no pants, thank you! I have no pants....." True, but you have wonderful socks.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T14:49:57-08:00

Bought a new coat for the New York trip:

Testing its compatibility with one of my more dapper upper body ensembles. I may or may not be wearing pants.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T16:48:42-08:00

That is one fine lookin' coat.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T17:15:00-08:00

@scs- they totally make the outfit i know ;) hehe

i second Fauxhammer's statment

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-17T22:18:32-08:00

David, that coat is looking GOOD! I got my boyfriend a peacoat for christmas and I can not wait to give it to him. They just always look good.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-18T00:58:49-08:00

Argh.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-18T02:56:07-08:00

Very fucking nice.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-18T04:41:05-08:00

Oh, and I gave myself some stupid short bangs.

I was feeling too vanilla.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-18T13:41:42-08:00

shame

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-18T15:14:41-08:00

Did this one a wee while ago, after I sprained my (non-drawing wrist).

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-18T15:30:15-08:00

I unearthed a box of old b&w photos from around the end of my college life, and the year I moved to the west coast, when I was still an actor. I didn't take these photos, but they are me. I'm going to put one up each day on flickr this week to remind myself of things I wanted to accomplish when this person was me. I'll cross-post them here too.

I'm about 22 in this one, brushing my luxurious mane before a performance of The Merchant of Venice. That was my real hair. I loved it so. (snif)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T01:26:05-08:00

Mid 90's me.

I loved that shirt.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T02:10:59-08:00

Me, too many years ago
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SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T05:41:52-08:00

Many, Many moons ago. I'm in the middle. I miss taking cheesy/prentious promo shots, hahaha.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T08:31:02-08:00

I have destroyed all photos of me prior to cutting off my long hair back in mid 2001 (that 's a lie, but you aren't going to see any of them...).
This was taken last week in my GF's (very pink) bathroom.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T10:06:16-08:00

@ Oldhat That is gorgeous!
@ oddbill Holy hair, batman!

A photo from when I was in high school. I kinda miss that hair, actually.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T10:34:19-08:00

Me back in 1992

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T11:12:46-08:00

Wait, so, what I am gathing from these historical snapshots is that I was the only fat, unattractive, classically trained dweeb in hih school. Yet again I have managed to single myself out. Blarg.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T11:34:21-08:00

no, no. I was chubs, too, and I was a band geek, at that.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T11:37:13-08:00

Fat as hell and was a theater and film geek here!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T11:46:35-08:00

I wasn't anyway near being slender - I tradition I maintain to this day.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T11:46:51-08:00

yup chunky spotty wargaming motherfucker... then breakdown and drugs made me skinny! yay?

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T12:06:33-08:00

Programming and English geek here... Plus hiding in baggy punk clothing and hanging out trying to get invited into D&D games.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T12:16:48-08:00

^^oh yeah, lots of over-sized, baggy clothing for me. Couldn't see my body shape at all. Then one day I discovered I have curves, but that wasn't until 3 or 4 years ago, while I was in college.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T12:35:49-08:00

haha I wore baggy black shirts, jeans that were three sizes too big and a GIANT black overcoat that hid anything that came close to a shape. Only recently in the past year or so have I started wearing form-fitting things.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T12:48:18-08:00

i still wear clothes that are huge... still a massive self image loather going on....

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T13:29:20-08:00

Rest assured my dears that I am now 41 and most definitely a fatty.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T13:41:06-08:00

@beamish--give me time to scan and post The Fat Pic To End All Fat Pics.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T14:35:15-08:00

Think this was between 1999 and 2001. God, I loved that jacket. I still have its remains, and if I can lose another 20lb and get handy with a needle I can wear it again...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T14:46:39-08:00

oooh ... awkward pics for our misspent youths theme!

I'm in.

Here is me in the 70s (supah cheap glasses!), the 80s (sad, sad peach fuzz moustache and my wannabe Miami Vice jacket *wince*) and the 90s (you girls got nothin' on my big hair!).

Jeez, these are painful to look at ... and yet I've complied and posted them for the world to see. Odd, that.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T15:18:15-08:00

Pffft! I got you young punks all beat....
1984. Eat it!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T16:22:42-08:00

You know, Sizer's almost makes the full circle back to cool again. I'm just sayin', it ain't actually all that bad.

I should find old pictures when I go home for christmas and scan them, my middle school years were by far my dorkiest. Until then, high school photos:

This one is from when I tried to have hair like Gaz in Invader Zim. I thought it looked way cooler back then.

From my pro-wrestling fan years when I had no discernible jaw-line and wore over-sized shirts:

When I thought wearing giant crystals on my neck was cool:

And finally, from my cult-like calc BC class (with an aforementioned Green Lantern shirt, over-sized, of course). Don't ask about the blue dots, we're not allowed to talk about them.):

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T16:26:40-08:00

Gotta agree with Argos. Sizer rocked the geek chic, like some sort of transcended Demi-god of Nerdery.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T16:44:08-08:00

This is the only picture of the olden days. Below that neck was a heck of a lot of a sophomore.

And, there is still plenty of fat bastard left.

And that being said, I made a grievous error in not writing down my starting wait but I am damn near 100 pounds less today. Which, of course, means that I was a ridiculously fat-ass, now I am down to a fat bastard.

Oh, Ampersand, YOWZAH, I wish I went to high school with, you so I could have a do-nothing crush where I glare at you from a distance and accept that I could never, in a million years, impress you. Mostly because I would be terrified to let slip that I too was a roleplayer, even if I knew you were one too.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T17:13:36-08:00

Only pantsless picture I could find easily (LOL):

I no longer am bald, but I don't feel like fixing the lighting in here to take a picture where you can see it. Maybe when I pee next.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T17:18:57-08:00

Holy SHIT, Sizer. I mean, kilts are cool and all, but you never should've dropped that look. Hot.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T17:48:12-08:00

The dorkitude of highschool:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T18:07:29-08:00

I'm the accusatory bearded thespian in the middle. This is from 1991, so I was still about 22.

I think I look a little like a cult leader in this one. Really though, I was a deer. You know, the one the Melancholy Jaques gets upset about in As You Like It.

I did a lot of Shakespeare in those days.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T18:25:07-08:00

Holy SHIT, Sizer. I mean, kilts are cool and all, but you never should've dropped that look. Hot.

You like that? Try my "Early 90's didn't tell me I was going bald/Wacky pose" phase...

or my "1982 Performance Artist" phase...

or my mid 80's "worked with her at a music store she liked hair metal I liked synthpop it would never work out OH MY GOD STOP BLOW DRYING YOUR HAIR SIZER!" phase...

Take your pick!
Fashion tip: Belt same color as shoes; always a chick magnet!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T19:30:10-08:00

Here, hair finally:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T21:58:43-08:00

Miki's back! Hooray!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T23:14:46-08:00

Hmmm. In high school I was petite. Very petite. I had horrible acne, wore baggy trousers and tight fitting shirts because I wanted to keep sure that everyone knew that I did indeed have tits, regardless of how small they were. Aside from the very fitted shirts, I usually dressed very androgynously, avoided makeup (my sister wore too much) and was very odd. Well, I am still quite odd, all things considered, but it was more obvious then.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-19T23:33:45-08:00

Oh dear GOD Sizer, you've had me on the floor with your photo comments. (Especially the last one.)

I feel I should go back and caption mine, now.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T08:56:33-08:00

@Beamish HAHA That's how my crushes worked, too. Except maybe I'd occasionally punch him in the stomach and casually say "ab test." I was kind of a jerk, actually. Still am =)
@Sizer Oh my... *fans self* That is the most amazing nerdery I have ever seen. Also, I second Rachael on the captions!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T09:29:16-08:00

^post ab test punch I would've had to carry my backpack like a fannypack to hide my shame. Then would've spent weeks imagining our eternal lives together. Yeah, that's the kind of guy I was/am in high school/now. I would've also failed the ab test.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T11:34:05-08:00

18 feels like forever ago....

my hair is VERY long in this photo but pulled up in a pony tail

later on i cut it all off

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T13:42:40-08:00

Hey, is that a Transmet Smiley? NICE!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T13:58:40-08:00

yes it is! :D

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T15:34:57-08:00

old vandalhandle which was the younger vandalhandle, this is from the late eighties

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T15:52:31-08:00

Late 70s here, unless you can't tell

(Waiting for someone to post a photo of themselves as a zygote. In my short time on Whitechapel I could see this happening.)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T18:57:19-08:00

lil Vandalhandle is looking at something INCREDIBLE!

I don't know - 23 or 24... in the costume shop. We threw on random pieces and posed and it came out looking like a promotional photo for some kind of comedy. I love how much attitude is coming across from my friend Thomas, and all you can see are his eyes in that visor.

Christ I miss doing plays!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T19:05:50-08:00

I forgot I can join in this nostalgia.

1996'ish:

1993'ish:

Fun, fun.

My favorite, ever:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T19:28:44-08:00

Miki... run... the Christians are going to EAT YOU!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T19:38:13-08:00

Miki, don't worry, we don't actually eat people.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T19:45:13-08:00

"Eat his body, drink his blood, and we'll sing a song of love, hallelu-, hallelu-, halellu-, hallelu-u-uja!"

...

run!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T19:45:46-08:00

Can't you read the banner? Beamish is right. They're not gonna eat you, they're just gonna feed you to his flock.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T19:48:58-08:00

Feed you soul. I'm not going to win this am I.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T19:54:53-08:00

@MikiM - We totally should have been friends in the 90's.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T20:47:32-08:00

90s me:

(To be fair, this is probably REALLY early 90s.)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T21:14:48-08:00

This is the oldest picture of me I have on photobucket.

It's a Gir suit.

And this is my favorite picture from high school. Staged for Scholarship purposes.

These are less than 5 years old or so, but it's the oldest things I had immediately available. And neither one is a self portrait. Still, nostalgia!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-20T22:02:29-08:00

@dorkmuffin holy shit I had hair growing out of my FACE in the 90s and you were Dora the goddam Explorer!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T03:36:32-08:00

Me in 98 (on the left). Yeah, I used to be a swami, before moving on to my buddha level.

That was background material for an occult LARP Vornaskotti wrote and I helped organise. Man, our flat had the fanciest fireplace.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T06:00:50-08:00

All you youngsters...
Glad to see you back around here, Miki. We missed you!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T10:08:39-08:00

4 year old me looking unimpressed at all the folkeyness...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T11:19:13-08:00

@zensurfer - Thank you.

@oldhat - Excellent!

@MikiM - That is a lovely new cut.

@vandalhandle - Cuuuuuute!

@Steve Toase - Hee hee!

@dorkmuffin - Adorable.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T18:16:20-08:00

Twenty four years old, asymmetrical hair, jean jacket, shorts, and somehow, inexplicably, single.

@Alastair - I'd like to think that, inside this little kid's head in 1990:

This was happening:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T18:26:57-08:00

Me around age 5 or 6 I think? Would have been '91-93 sometime. Three of four brothers, two little ones are Mike and Gabe, big one is Tomm, and I'm at the top.

The window behind is the one that my Ghostbusters firehouse went out of when Mike and Gabe decided (while home sick one day--I was at school) that I didn't need to have things that I liked. Oh, memories. Oh, brothers.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T18:34:17-08:00

You guuuuuuuuuuuuuuys
These pictures are phenomenal.
(And, oh man, Sizer, oh man. Of all the decades I wish I was born in..... Also you remind me of my favourite high school science teacher in the second one.)

I have nothing to contribute. A few years ago I scanned some childhood artwork and cards and things, but no photos. Bummer.
I do have a video of me when I was 17, in which I look and sound exactly as I do now. Better fashion sense back then, too, I think.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T21:25:45-08:00

AAAAHH HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!

@oddbill, That was fabulous. I'd like to think that was going on in his head as well. Also, I feel kind of wierd pointing this out, but longhaired young you looks strikingly like my longhaired young dad (the fellow on the left):

Here's a news clipping of me:

The statues are still there, only now they've been bronzed.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T22:47:04-08:00

Me in 1980:

And now:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-21T23:04:44-08:00

1993ish (far right):

And now:

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-22T10:51:51-08:00

Getting down with some serious sandplay.

@taphead There is a gaping hole in my adolescence where you and Vornaskotti should have been.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-22T15:36:43-08:00

@Oddbill and Rachael that is exactly the case... all through my childhood i never understood why what I imagined in my head what music should be wasn't what i heard around me e.g folky parents/poppy older sister. Then i remember watching a documentary with my dad when i was 8 on music and Black Sabbath: Paranoid came on, it was THE music! it was MY music! i turned to my dad and said (he has relayed this to me numerous times)

"What is this?! its perfect!"
and he said:
"thats heavy metal"

he went through a major alcohol problem and we didn't speak for a long time. we eventually bonded again over music and though my tastes have changed these days and i like a lot of varied music but that moment has stayed with me for 18 years now....

i can't find many photos of us together so here is another treat my dad gave me and a reminder of how much he means to me
the two of us at the grand canyon earlier this year...

tl:dr? my dad changed my life for the better... a lot

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-22T19:38:29-08:00

Twenty sixish:

Tomorrow I'll post a really embarrassing one.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-23T18:39:01-08:00

Everybody's gone, so I can dump this humiliating old acting career glossy from 1996 and nobody will see it!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-23T19:28:54-08:00

YES.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-23T20:58:27-08:00

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHH!

I'm dying over here.

BTW: I'd hit it. 3 times. :P

@Rachael: We can have a meet sometime and dress like we did in the 90's. Then we can pretend we grew up together. :D

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-23T22:53:41-08:00

I think I kinda still dress like I did in the 90's, so that'll be easy! I still have a pile of oversized Sandman Tshirts stashed away somewhere that I can't bear to part with. The only real difference about now is the lack of fishnetted arms. :D

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-24T01:23:52-08:00

@oddbill: Denim shirts are awesome; never let anybody tell you different.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-24T02:04:59-08:00

Denim is the king of fabric. Parachutes should be made from denim.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-24T18:51:51-08:00

...aaaaand with this I'll go dark on the SPIT for a while, but this one caps my "week in b&w":

This is me and my friend Alissa in some promotional shots for a production of Athol Fugard's Hello and Goodbye, that we produced and performed together back in the mid 1990s. It got a Pick of the Week in the LA Weekly, the LA Times liked us as performers but hated the play, and Dramalogue hated us as performers but liked the play. We were lucky not to get a fourth review!

Here is what was written about me in the LA Times review:

Gorgen is an icy tomb of repressed feeling, smoldering at their secondhand lives that got used up, while Cunningham's introvert oozes overtones of Norman Bates as he flails in harrowing stream-of-consciousness monologues.

William Alex Cunningham - oozing overtones of Norman Bates since 1996.

I love these photos because they look like stills from a 1950s teleplay.

This week on Playhouse 90...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-24T21:29:55-08:00

Shitty Christmas Eve for various reasons (that at least ended well). Pretty dress that I stole from my sister.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-25T04:32:58-08:00

Hubba hubba, Caroline. Hope the rest of Christmas goes better, hon.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-25T04:55:42-08:00

Damn, I visited home-home for Christmas but forgot to dig out a newspaper clipping for my first public nude photo... I was something like one year old, running totally naked on a beach, and that photo was on some "summer photos" feature of the newspaper with a caption "Just a flash".

These days though I probably shouldn't publish stuff like that on a forum, lest some hysterical asshole pull the whole forum down for kiddie porn. Personally I sort of wonder about people whose first thought when they see a photo of a naked toddler is "OMG porn"...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-26T17:07:12-08:00

It's nearly the end of the year, so fuck it, why not embarrass myself one last time...
Me as Johnny Armageddon, my high school punk rock/new wave alias in 1981:

and me and my sister Nancy punking/waving out a year later...

...because that's how we rolled in the 80's, man! With white shoes from the marching band.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-26T18:25:36-08:00

@Sizer You look like we should have been in high school at the same time/place. We would've been buddies, methinks.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-26T20:07:09-08:00

Man, Sizer, you look petameters better in a skinny tie than I ever will!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-26T20:33:39-08:00

So, I think if we all had Tardis' we can all agree that we should all go back to go to high school together. The Whitechapel School for the Gifted Future Deviants.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-26T21:02:55-08:00

Oh my god. I am crying right now because that can never happen.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-26T21:13:44-08:00

Ditto. That sounds fucking amazing.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-27T05:22:42-08:00

between having a toumor cut out in Feb and a gut bug over the summer, I lost 35 pounds this year, back down to about the size i was at 20. Not the best way to loose it but feel more like myself than i have in a while. Oh and after 42 years of perfect 20/20 now I need reading glasses.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-27T07:43:54-08:00

Good to see you people have kept on being pretty and awesome in my absence this December. Starting to suspect Sizer isn't human, but just jumped out of the pages of some comic.

I got German language courses on CD for Christmas! Also not wearing pants (and could use a shower, too many G&Ts last night and uuugh.)

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-27T10:26:12-08:00

Starting to suspect Sizer isn't human, but just jumped out of the pages of some comic.

Is there even a question of this any more? : )
Even after too many G&T's, you're still the cutest girl named Oda that I know.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-27T14:45:26-08:00

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-27T16:07:55-08:00

Hello all been a while since I posted anything hope you had a good one and happy new year and all that.

Playing stupid word games, need to comfort myself.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-27T17:09:44-08:00

~ part of the guest directed self portrait project ~

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-28T03:44:26-08:00

Alastair, those tees you and your missus are wearing totally RULE.

I SEE YOU THROUGH THE SCREENS, WHITECHAPELS

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-28T05:34:42-08:00

@Salgood Sam - given the circumstances, I'm not sure congratulations are the correct sentiment for your weight loss, but you are due mad respect for your superb sideburns.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-28T05:37:50-08:00

This is from October (and has been cross posted to the Halloween costume thread with my other shots), but my roommate only just uploaded it, so... here!

You can't see my vampire bite mark, unfortunately.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-28T05:51:27-08:00

I want to party with all of Whitechapel. Having partied with one, I want to extend that out to the entire tribe.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-28T08:24:31-08:00

Everyone on Whitechapel is as hot as all hell, dammit

It's barely in shot but I have a new hat (an important item for me, as I am never without a hat of some sort.).

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-28T08:43:41-08:00

@Salgood Sam - given the circumstances, I'm not sure congratulations are the correct sentiment for your weight loss, but you are due mad respect for your superb sideburns.

Thanks @Osmosis, i've sported a few different configurations of facial hair, I think the mutton chops are my favourite.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-28T10:47:39-08:00

When you all die (hopefully many years from now, and peacefully), and stand before your Maker, I wouldn't be surprised if He had a magnificent set of celestial sideburns.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-29T15:20:11-08:00

Last of my holiday commitments with my adopted family in Dirty Jersey. So exhausted from this Xmas, it has been a week long.
On the plus side I was crowned a pretty, pretty sparklepony princess so I got that going for me.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-29T17:01:32-08:00

A man and his sparklepony. 2011 in a nutshell.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-30T09:27:49-08:00

Long may the Sparklepony Princess reign!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-30T11:07:02-08:00

Sizer, I want to see some of those SPIT images in either the 'draw each other' thread or in a Remake/remodel. If you want to perpetuate the idea that you did actually step out of the pages of a funnybook then Johnny Armageddon deserves a resurrection!

PRINCESS SPARKLEPONY COMMANDS IT! Make it so.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-30T12:04:00-08:00

@Bankara - is the drink for the pony or for you?

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-30T12:37:51-08:00

Thats for me, she only drinks champagne.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-30T13:04:33-08:00

Me 17 years ago... I now rock a hairstyle and facial attire similar to odd bill...

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-31T08:25:24-08:00

valuable life lesson #3,987: never wear khaki pants to a punk show.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-31T11:55:52-08:00

I, too, did the guest-directed thing.

It's a cool project! I want more assignments, more contests, more ordering-around.

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-31T11:59:35-08:00

Also, I second Bankara re: Sizer's photos. Seriously, Paul, those are the best pictures ever. I have to meet you in person now.

Also, Bill, those promo shots from the play are fantastic!

SPITcember (The December 2011 Self Portrait Image Thread)

2011-12-31T17:58:09-08:00

Also, I second Bankara re: Sizer's photos. Seriously, Paul, those are the best pictures ever. I have to meet you in person now.

Paul Sizer is available for public appearances, comic shows and children's birthday parties.
: )
Maybe someday...if fate smiles upon us.