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: [Closed] SPINNING YARNS -- the Tell Us A Story Thread (Closes Feb 20th)
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Jan 27th 2012
High School Post-Puberty Sick Twisted Decent Into Alienation And Origin Of A Bad-Boy.
I was nearly fifteen and doing ok at school:top of the year in chemistry and enjoying English,art etc.
I started to see this girl.Bit older than me and pretty as hell.While we where dating i sensed something...a bit strange about her.Still,i was infatuated.
One weekend my single-parent-jazz-groupie-mom was away and i had a small party.I ended up,of course,sleeping with this girl.We had clumsy sex BUT we didn't go all the way.Sometime after the thing with the girl came to an end.No big deal.
This is when school turned into a surreal nightmare.Teachers used to ask me to stay behind after class telling me they knew what i'd done.The bearded twat religious education teacher had it in for me big style.The girls i was mates with started to give me dirty looks.Honest,i was so young and naive i had no idea for a while what was up.I guess it was then that i noticed that the girl i had been seeing had started putting on weight and looked bloated.And one lunchtime i discovered the letter.Pure sickness...
She'd wrote in graphic detail that we'd(please excuse me for this,the're not my words)gotten my semen and that we'd used our hands to force it up her to impregnate her.Fuck...i think i fell over with nausea,disgust and horror.I was just a kid.There where all sorts of other perverted,twisted lies and this letter had been passed around the school and people where believing it's absurd contents.She even rang my mom saying i'd gotten her pregnant.
Of course it ended up she just had a problem with her glands.It was dealt with terribly,brushed under the carpet as was the way then.But the damage had been done and my life at school went to shit,forcing me and my gang to go there one night so i could pick up a paving stone and throw it through the head's window laughing insanely...
Jan 27th 2012
@Flecky... ow... ow... ow...
I had two flatmates who split up badly... things were kind of OK until she got a new bloke. Who was a special policeman. This was somehow inflammatory, and the jilted guy went literally insane. One night, the girl and her new chap (in uniform, which I think was the catalyst for what followed) were in the front room, and he'd, we thought, gone to bed. Until they went to bed, and found him naked, in her bed. She screamed, and sent me in there to negotiate with him. Which I did, eventually, getting him to slink off. All was calm, and after they'd chilled out again, they went to go to bed again. This time, he came flying out of his room and started banging on their door - 'Hey copper, she say's you're shit in bed. That I'm the best she's had and that you can't get it up. And your dick's tiny, she's told me that'. New bloke, surprisingly, kept very cool while getting all the abuse. Which carried on - 'I bet you're trying to shag her now, but you CAN'T... hahahahahahahahaha. Get it up if you can, you limp dicked bastard'.
After a little while longer of this, they decided to cut and run back to his house, leaving me alone with this guy who was pretty much frothing at the mouth. At this point, given that a week or so before he'd tried to set fire to himself in a duvet, I had a panic attack and collapsed. When I pulled myself together, I put on my biggest pair of paratrooper boots and slept in those, then first thing in the morning went down the pub, where I stayed all day fuming. In the afternoon, he phoned the pub (this was before mobiles - he'd guessed where I was) and asked if he could meet me. I told him he had to get out, there was no coming back from this - it took us another three months, I think to finally get him out, which included me having to pin him to the wall by the throat when he went for me... Was truly a horrible episode.
Jan 27th 2012
Worst break up I was a third party for was my college hausmate living in a big geek haus. His girlfriend of many years, whom he was very much in love with, decided that she'd had enough of him, revealed one day in spat that she'd been cheating on him and only using him for his money (he made a LOT of money as a senior sys admin for Cisco) . She then dumped him.
This fucked him up.
While the rest of us were gone he wrote a note that saying he was going drive up the Pacific Coast Highway at speed on his bike and if he made it to San Fran from Santa Cruz then that meant he was supposed to live. And, if not, well, he was dead so fuck it. This was left on our haus server with a timer to send it off to all of us at 5:30 when we were back from work and school.
Another hausmate found the note while mucking about in the server. No suicidal hausmate to be seen, missing bike. Said hausmate was also the keeper of the lease and without him we'd all be fucked.
Next was a couple of hours of frantic calling around of friends when we FINALLY found him down with a friend in Monterey. Turns out he went to go ahead with his plan, pulled out into the street, and was nearly, promptly run over by a car making an illegal left.
"THAT FUCKER NEARLY KILLED ME!" he told us he thought. Which was then followed up by, "Wait a minute....oh." He then drove, carefully, to Monterey to see his friend and have some sense talked into him.
He bought us all dinner and a ton of booze as a make-up present.
Jan 30th 2012
I've always been a tool in my relationships, either being oblivious to true motives or being a cold fish from an inability to make the first steps. This means that i have also had rather few and sparse relationships, due to said ineptitude. At least it makes for an easy choice of stories.
So, the breakup was easy enough. An early morning text telling me in a few short sentences that the relationship was over and that she was sorry. I barely even noticed i was still under her thumb. A few days after, she gets back with her ex, while at the same time playing the mind games with me - "I wish we could be together", "Its just me and you, really". I wont go any further, for as i said - total tool.
Suffice to say i was made quite the cynic towards most relationships that time had yet to test. This also means that I've been out of a relationship for over three years now.
HAPPY ENDINGS MAKE HAPPY PEOPLE (and the lack ballistic crotch worms)
Something posted here a while ago, a youtube video entitled 'How To Be Alone", where I took the quotation "If you're happy in your head, then solitude is blessed and alone is okay".
Jan 30th 2012
@Orpheus:You know,there is a lot of truth in that quotation.Ok,maybe i'm not the best example or the best to give advice, but i've found that it can be be better to be alone and to,naturally,feel lonely now and again than to be in a relationship just for the sake of it.It's also like when your with a group of people and your trying so hard to fit in that you stop being your true self which usually just ends up compounding the feelings of loneliness.
But hey,that's just me.
Jan 31st 2012
That's not just you. That's proper wisdom. Well said.
Jan 31st 2012
Final year of university, I worked with this amazing beauty six years my senior. I asked her out and she said no. We started hanging out non-stop and fighting like an old married couple. After about six months of that she agreed that we could date, but insisted we still see other people. OK. I wasn’t going to. One night while we were all but having sex, she announces that she wants to be exclusive.I already was. Done. The following morning, she asks if she’d really made such an absurd suggestion. Yep. (note the quotes… this isn’t me being writerly, these are her exact words) “What orifice did that come out of?” In the ensuing fight, I discovered that I was a man and therefore gonna’ cheat. If we’re seeing other people, then it’s not cheating. While that pile of crazy didn’t end the relationship on the spot (ahhh, the stupidity of youth), it started a death spiral that lead to me deciding not to be with her anymore.
I broke up with her and then again every night for the next week (since I was foolish enough to take the tear-filled phone calls). They included gems like “you’re right, we shouldn’t see other people there’s someone else, isn’t there?” (in this case, note the lack of punctuation) Eventually, she showed up at my door and I had to explain through it that there was no one else and I’d rather be alone than be with her.
My next serious relationship was my ex-wife. Sorry @Si. With my love life, the only happy endings seem to be the ones I give out for a fiver to help pay off my divorce attorney. But I’m at the point where I’d like a relationship, but don’t need one, so no worries.
Jan 31st 2012
I met her a month before I moved to San Francisco. She was going to join me out here. For a while I was living the city for two of us, and the letters and mixtapes back and forth were a joy.
Then after a performance of hers went badly, she demanded proof that I loved her. Qualifying such things to a paranoid pothead under serious stress was never going to work. We broke up over the phone.
I spent a long time walking alone thru this city I barely knew. What felt like a cinder block parked itself in my gut for about a week there.
My best friend from high school wound up moving here, which pretty much saved me.
Home for Christmas, I talked to a friend who knew her and me. I related the details of the breakup.
"You realize that she was fucking insane, right?"
Absorbed as I was by what turned me on/moved me about her, I actually hadn't realized that, but it made an awful lot of sense. Said friend was threatening to kick said ex's ass if she ever saw her again, but as colorful, sweet, and moving as her profanity-laden tirade no doubt was, I couldn't hear it through the deafening whoosh of the departure of my post-break-up malaise.
I emerged from that break-up wiser and more cautious, and returned to SF ready to live, which I've done ever since.
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