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  1.  (10541.1)
    Let's have a 24-hour spleenspaff, shall we?

    Will get a week-long THREE ACT SPEAKEASY thing going from tomorrow, but for now: SCREAM INTO MY VOID. (fnar)
  2.  (10541.2)
    Just watched Richard Ayoade's Submarine. It lifted my spirits and I thoroughly recommend it to everyone.

    I haven't had any ale for a few weeks now due to trying to save pennies. I would atomise each and every one of you for a drop of beautiful, beautiful beer. I'm trying to save my twelve-year-old Singleton for special occasions, but I think I'll have a wee dram or two this evening. After all, I deserve it for being such an excellent person.
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    Took my son to the comic shop for the first time. What did I buy him? The Goddamn Batman of course. It was magic.

    Oh and this web radio project I have been building launched a month of material curated by PLU again, it was like being a proud dad.
  3.  (10541.4)
    Today is my Mom's birthday. Looking forward to seeing her be very happy with her present. Making gnocchi for the evening meal. Tomorrow is a date with some dude on okcupid. Ultimately I'm going for the ego stroking more than anything else. I am a horrible person, I know. He might even be interesting for all I know. My other goal is for him to leave with a decent portrait of himself so he'll have at least one decent photo to post of himself on okcupid.

    Okcupid pet peeve: Seriously guys (not WC guys because you actually take good photos of yourselves, thank fuck), are you really that incapable of having one flattering photo of yourself? How can I be remotely attracted to you if my first guess at what you look like makes me feel a little sick? Pulling goofy faces? Really? Crap party photo where you're obviously doing something stupid while drunk? Really? At least take one of those mirror hipster photos! You might look a touch self important but at least you might have a chance at looking attractive. Sheeh. There are cute guys who have good photos of themselves, but they don't tend to live in my area. /endrant.

    Monday is the 2nd date that was supposed to happen forever ago but things kept coming up with the guy that I actually like (I think). He's cooking me dinner at least. And if he's been honest, he was/is at a funeral today. So yeah. That's what's going on with me.
  4.  (10541.5)
    Feeling rough as hell, must have some sort of head cold. Worked like a bastard all morning in the garden - fixed the fence back up which had blown over, cleared a few beds, savagely attacked the pampas grass and the brambles with a five-foot iron bar. Then was so knackered I went to sleep on the floor for three hours. Need to do work-work tomorrow, have a massive backlog and next week is going to be hell, I know it already.

    In a generally foul mood at the moment, there's heavy stuff happening which is making me very tense and irritable and nervy, and I'm a rather volatile bag of emotions, as is my partner. I don't have much outlet, as I'm trying to avoid drinking at the moment. Feel like blowing a gasket and going all Charlie Sheen. Ach, bollocks.

    My middle daughter is being given extra support (before school sessions) with her reading, she's fallen behind quite a way. I'm really glad she's getting it because she needs the help, but feel quite guilty about it. My eldest girl is probably 18 months/2 years ahead of her age group and believes she's some sort of child prodigy - she had all the support and encouragement, we read to her and with her loads and I don't think we did nearly enough for Ro. Partly she didn't have the same drive or enthusiasm, but we should have done more. She just doesn't have the confidence. Get really cross when the older one gloats over her, she doesn't realise how much more help she had.

    But, screw it. Spring is nearly here.

    Greetings Whitechapel.
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    Don't beat yourself up about it JP. That's a standard family dynamic right there. What you feel you didn't give in terms of academic support you will have made up for in terms of being more chilled out.
    • CommentAuthorPuck
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    Lurker but not really much of a poster, so forgive the intrusion.

    Trying to work out what to do with myself - got dropped like a sack of spuds by my long term girlfriend last week (over the fucking phone would you believe?). Not my longest relationship, but the first where I saw babies a future, and all that grown-up shit.

    she was looking for that, just not with me. "maybe you're not the type, maybe you're not supposed to stay in one place for too long".

    To prove her wrong, I'm throwing in my job and planning to move to Brighton at the beginning of next month. Wait. What?

    Any Brighton bods want to say hi?

    To save money, I spent the day editing the first three chapters of a book I'm writing. I talked about the project on the board somewhere, basically I visited all 56 working piers in England and Wales in ten days last September and am in the process of writing the damn book. the book is split perspective between me and my co-author, I'm waiting for his chapters so we can send them to a editor were hiring to splice them together and polish them all real good and nice. Then we shop them to the publishers, although I'm not sure my fragile ego at the moment could take the rejection.

    ***cut too a couple of months away we standing in the rain texting publishers DID YOU EVA LOVE ME? and crying**
    • CommentAuthorSteve Toase
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012 edited
    Sat at home having edited my latest story while watching Boney M sing about the Irish Troubles in Belfast.

    And Shawaddywaddy
  5.  (10541.9)
    @ trini - Your post had me laughing aloud, as I have just been saying that EXACT THING to myself as recently as last night (when I spontaneously decided to look at my account after months of abandonment). Yeah, guys. Seriously.

    Here are some pointers, people: You should actually TAKE a photograph on purpose, not just find what your friends have snapped accidentally. Don't use webcams, because computer monitors create the least flattering lighting for skin imaginable. Figure out a decent angle for your face. Decent posture (SHOULDERS BACK). Also, though this might seem anti-manly or some such rot, please try to smile. It really does make the face better looking, and shows some personality.
    • CommentAuthorchris g
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012 edited
    Showed up to work this morning and find out WWE's World champion Daniel Bryan is now following me on twitter, haha. That was cool. But then I scroll down and hear Moebius died so that bummed me out. Then I read Dean Haspiel's LJ about some infection he's dealing with. He's a big inspiration for me so that was heartbreaking to read. Hope he recovers fast. Anyway, I've decided to be perpetually neutral/indifferent about all stuff.

    Also I guess this time for realz my boss who is never around finally made a deal and is selling this big ol corner building I work alone in, so I guess the ride is over but I can work in the other furniture store which is closer to home anyway. I don't know, I liked the last year I spent by myself here; there were no diva salesmen to babysit or compete with and I could sell some small things and pocket the cash, ha! Kinda sorta dreading being at the other store though since it is smaller and more people pop in just to waste your time but it will be more hours so more $ and I can get home sooner and be with kitty and do ART sooner. I guess I will be relieved to wash my hands of this place even though in the last 5 years I learned and grew a shitload as a person [thanks to mostly dicking around here on Freakchapel during the days], whereas before working here I was rather sheltered and I was one of those assholes that act like they know everything and shit on everything. The good thing is I don't hate myself like I used to. And I realized I have everything I need; cat, art, home. But still, some syrys trials an tribulation shit is coming fast but I guess I am as ready as I'll ever fucking be.

    Also been avoiding weekend drinking (shock!) for about a month now. I always end up embarrassing myself online and don't remember shit and am dizzy most of the next day so I don't want that anymore. Also I hate that puffy booze face you get for drinking too much. Last I checked I weighed in at a gangsta 187lbs but I would still like to drop more weight because well I don't need to be heavy to draw fucking comics or whatever. I'm just trying to stay disciplined and focused on art and shit. crazy cat boy OUT
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    Hello Whitechapel, it's been a while since we've sat down together like this. I've missed it.

    For those of you who know, my brother is home again. He seems to be doing ok so far. Live & let live stuff helps a little. We don't engage him and that leaves us in peace. So far....

    re - Pics of guys online: Guys, please understand, yes good looks are a lot of genetics. But bad looks are a lot of ignoring simple things you can do for yourselves, like regular grooming & hygiene and maintaining good posture. I know it sounds silly and trite, but seriously you'll help yourself a zillion fold with just keeping clean, combed and sitting up straight.

    Yesterday I had to remind myself that there was no more new Freakangels. It was a bummer to have forgotten after all this time.

    I really want to stop sleeping away my days, but i'm not sure how to get control of my life again. I really don't. I don't know how to elaborate exactly. I just don't have anything to grab onto, even though there is a fuck load of shit I want to get done. And you know what's worse? I keep being reminded that life is temporary, I'm mortal, my opportunities are all right here at hand but they won't always be... and I'm still floating around like a zombie in a haze. I don't feel sad/depressed, I'm not waiting for anything in particular. I'm a complete self-made disaster. No drugs, no bad relationships, no oppression... just. Nothing.

    In the mean time plans fall to the wayside. I don't write. I don't practice voice over stuff. I don't study my Japanese. I don't work on my reading stack.... I'm falling behind where I wanted to be and just watching my goals recede with little feeling about the whole thing.

    But I do respond to friends' invitations out - headed soon to a play with a dear friend. Someone who gets me, gets what I love in theatre and the arts, listens to me and lets me in on her personal issues. So today at least shouldn't (*knocks wood*) be a complete loss.

    Flecky's been very quiet for a while. A bit worried since he mentioned he used again a couple months ago.
  6.  (10541.12)
    Been down the local for the first time in months.
    Am a little bit drunk. Met up with some folks I kinda know, got a contact for potential modelling work for my next door neighbour.
    If I could find a way to monetise my apparent skill for putting people who could help each other together, that would be grand.

    Should be writing more, set myself a deadline for my novel, currently owe myself 7000 words after a week. Not good.
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    I've written a thing here over and over and all that it comes down to is that I should stop doing this one thing and get moving forth on the things I'm avoiding. So I'm going to do that.
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012 edited
    Afflicted with an annoying eye condition called central serous retinopathy, which is where a small amount of fluid leaks into the retina and forms a tiny bubble. There's a huge distorted amber blotch in my centre of vision and I'm not happy.
    The good news is that it usually goes away on its own after a few weeks. Also, I have a legitimate excuse to purchase and wear a pirate eyepatch.
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    @razrangel- I could literally copy/paste that middle paragraph of yours into my post and it would be just as true as if I had written it. I wish I could understand why it's so easy to fall into such a self-defeating state; if I could, you'd be the first person I'd share w/.

    Not much to say. I'm still just treading water. Employers require me to do the work of two people, and it's getting frustrating. I keep saying I'm going to take a week off, but I've been saying a lot of stuff for a long time. I've had broken glasses for... A year? Year and a half? It'd probably cost me all of $50, tops, to get new ones. But I just never do it. I don't fucking know...

    Also, our neighbors' car was stolen out of the parking lot. They park next to our cars. Kinda scary.

    Otherwise, can't say things are terrible.
    • CommentAuthorRenThing
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    Currently waiting for the wife-thing's call to say she's landed. She's been in Toronto (we live in California) on business the last three days which has meant a lot of alone time with the spawn. Spawn is good but he hasn't been sleeping well, he's had one point every night since she's left where he's woken up shrieking like Slender Man was at the foot of his bead, necessitating me staggering down the hall, making sure the room is Slendy free, and then spending the next thirty to forty-five minutes rocking him back to sleep. However, tomorrow I have completely free from baby-watching duty so I plan on writing, playing video games, and gardening a little.

    Other than that though things go well. I'm snarking and drinking my way through the Twilight series and getting some decent feedback from my blog (and tripled my daily visit count when I post a new update which is cool), I'm thinking of making it a regular thing reading one bad book a month and reviewing it after a few shots of whiskey.
  7.  (10541.17)
    @Rachael: OMG thanks yes this (etc). I think part of the reason I feel so cranky about it is that it feels like they expect us to put effort into looking nice, but they can't be bothered.

    @razrangel: What you said too. It's so true. Also hugs. I also know the feeling of not being able to get anything done all too well.

    @JP Carpenter: Oh kids. Remembering how things were with my sister and I, when we were about what your kids age are, my sister did better in school and I struggled to stay afloat. These days my sister tends to treat thinking as too much work and I'm the nerd who devours books and remembers all sorts of ridiculousness. Encouragement and love can go a long way. So don't beat yourself up about it. I imagine that because she's getting extra help, you and your partner know whether or not your middle daughter has a learning disability. I had/have a learning disability (dysnomia - mostly has to do with language recall and speech and writing) which my parents caught on to when i was 4/5, and got help with, and my parents got some training on. And a learning disability really just means one learns slightly differently and once one figures out what works and doesn't, one can outdo everyone else. Which of course, all this stuff I'm mentioning could be absolutely useless, but who knows, maybe it could be useful? Oh oh oh! And I swear by this. Doodling is essential to learning. There's even a TED talk around somewhere that confirms what I've always known as a doodler (who aces tests).
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    I'm sitting here with my roommate watching some Korean movie whose title I've never gotten. I'm just having a good lazy weekend. I don't get these very often anymore. I've been drawing a lot lately, gotten a fair amount of commissions. It's nice that art is slowly becoming my primary source of income. I've been working at Starbucks the last few months after losing my old job last year, so that's been sort of a soul crusher. Also, 2011 was a shit year for me in general. So this one is turning out pretty good so far. My first anniversary with my favorite guy is coming up next week, I've got a birthday next month, this winter has been pretty mild (only a couple of substantial snows, a rarity for Colorado), and generally a better mood.

    Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to paint a pony into a Deadpool.
    • CommentAuthorStefanJ
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    I'm doing pretty well myself. The days are getting longer, and there were a few really nice days over the last week. I restarted a long delayed project. And I mean LONG delayed. Delayed longer than a lot of you out there have been alive. It's horribly, terribly geeky . . . no nerdy. But I'm going to do it.


    One of my best buddies from college lost his little boy to leukemia about six years back.

    Then his wife got lymphoma. She's in full remission, but still, that kind of thing takes a toll.

    Last week they found out that their teenage daughter has cancer too.

    I mean, shit. I live half a continent away and feel so bad not being able to help. I've been losing sleep over this.
    • CommentTimeMar 10th 2012
    Chain-watching Supernatural and writing some fanfic to avoid having to think about my financial situation.

    At least I get to make some airguns tomorrow at crashspace.