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  1.  (10560.1)
    The REMAKE/REMODEL meme is one of my favourite things. Artists need a place to show off and Whitechapel should always be It. A handful of entries will be showcased on Bleedingcool at the end of each challenge.

    SPEED CENTUAR

    THE RULES:

    This is for ART ONLY. Any pen-portraits, or crappy scribbles padded-out with words, will cause a deployment of the newly-trained Urethral Attack Maggots. And a banned account.

    No stock-photo manipulation. No half-arsed bollocks. Anything deemed to be piss-takery will be nuked from orbit. Original photography is fine.

    No more than ONE submission by any one person.

    INSTRUCTIONS:

    SPEED CENTAUR

    Many thanks to Jess Nevins for drawing my attention to this little dollop of Wonderful Weird from the pages of Amazing Mystery Funnies. This infoblot from Dan Markstein’s Toonopedia:
    It's tempting to say Speed Centaur was the oddest of the oddballs, but with so many oddballs around it's hard to be sure. He certainly was an odd one. To begin with, he was, like, a centaur! Four legs, hooves, human torso on top of a horse torso, etc., making it hard to figure how he fits into human society while at the same time conferring little apparent benefit on his pursuit of urban adventure…
    Speed didn't start out as a city dweller. He was born into a tribe of similar creatures, which lived far away in the frozen North. When he was very young an earthquake wiped out all the others. He was found wandering alone through a snowstorm by trapper Maurice Norton, who raised him, teaching him English and French. Later, he took up with a reporter named Jerry "Reel" McCoy, who hailed from civilized climes. It was Jerry who brought Speed to New York, where, with Jerry as assistant, he took up the avocation of superheroing.

    Not much more to say about that. Things I particularly like:
    1. the notion of a fucking ridiculous mythical chimaera trying to get by in contemporary (or future?) society.
    2. the fact that someone felt an English-speaking horsebloke wasn’t urbane enough, and taught the galloping manebotherer French as well – presumably so he’d feel more at home during those requisite balmy afternoons crunching sugarcubes outside Parisian cafés.
    And 3. the notion of trying to sell this guy as a street-level Urban! Hero! – complete with acrobatic rooftop chases and desperate gangland vendettas. Daredevil-with-hooves is too delightful a concept to ignore.

    LET’S RIDE.
    • CommentAuthorWood
    • CommentTimeMar 19th 2012
     (10560.2)
    Maybe by "the Frozen North" they mean French Canada ? Hence the teaching of both languages ?
  2.  (10560.3)
    PARISIAN.

    CAFES.
    • CommentAuthordnewling
    • CommentTimeMar 19th 2012
     (10560.4)
    Ah, so we're back to remaking a character. Okay....
  3.  (10560.5)
    I'm in.

    No penises this time.

    Probably.
    • CommentAuthordnewling
    • CommentTimeMar 19th 2012
     (10560.6)
    Is it my imagination, or would 'Speed Centaur' be a good name for a motorbike? Or a racing car?
  4.  (10560.7)
    It would also be a good name for someone so out of their heads on methamphetamines that they think they're half horse.

    (Hmmm, that's meant to be a semi-witty comment, but if it's encroaching on pen portrait territory then please feel free to nuke from orbit Si!)
    • CommentAuthordnewling
    • CommentTimeMar 19th 2012
     (10560.8)
    @Purple Wyrm: I reckon we're going to have a lot of 'horse' jokes with this one.

    Hmm, I think I'm getting an idea (but no racing cars or motorbikes). Hope I can get it together before the deadlinel.
  5.  (10560.9)
    This made me think of the crazy 1960's Superman/ Lois Lane stories where Lois was always trying to discover Superman's secret identity. I just had to submit a quick sketch...
    Speed Centaur's secret identity
  6.  (10560.10)
    Magnificent!
    •  
      CommentAuthorFredG
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2012
     (10560.11)
    AHHH, Jeff I was going the same direction, just was trying figure out what the pants would look like. Good one, now back to the drawing board for me. Centaur-Batman?
    • CommentAuthorOxbrow
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2012
     (10560.12)
    Speed Centaur by Oxbrow

    I considered the issues of a centaur having a secret identity too, then realised he'd be able to use it to his advantage.

    He can also go undercover as other horses around the city, like a racehorse to smash gambling syndicates, or one of those Central Park carriage horses to... stop muggers... or... um...

    There may well be a way to make a centaur work in a gritty urban milieu. This may not be it.

    Giganto version
    •  
      CommentAuthorcurb
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2012
     (10560.13)
    Sounds like hella fun to me! He could smash gangs of evil vivisectionists, foil the plans of ketamine smugglers, and peep at the seemy underbelly of vegas showhorses!
    •  
      CommentAuthorBeamish
    • CommentTimeMar 20th 2012
     (10560.14)
    Love them so far, keep it up folks!
  7.  (10560.15)
    There's more than one way to make French relevant to the story.....

  8.  (10560.16)
    DISCREET INCLUSION OF HORSEDONG PRIZE
  9.  (10560.17)
    "Discretion" is my middle name.

    No, wait, it's "AnaRcHy!" but "discretion" is a concept I... I've heard of.
    •  
      CommentAuthorFredG
    • CommentTimeMar 22nd 2012
     (10560.18)
    Speed's story reminded me of a movie I saw (had seen?) once long ago...

    midnight-cowboy
  10.  (10560.19)
    HA HA HA! @FredG too funny!
    • CommentAuthorDBed
    • CommentTimeMar 22nd 2012
     (10560.20)
    A slightly different take...

    Speed Centaur by David Bednarski