When you approach me in public, you are Schrödinger’s Rapist. You may or may not be a man who would commit rape. I won’t know for sure unless you start sexually assaulting me.

The rookie officers prepared to stump up the £2,000 fees were promised their hard won diplomas would land them jobs keeping the streets safe from criminals – including, one imagines, apprehending the innovative counterfeiters who have produced a long list of fraudulent products, including fake walnuts, vintage wine and the ubiquitous plastic Rolex.

To pass the time during long flights, artist Nina Katchadourian goes to the lavatory, adorns herself in tissue paper costume, and creates hilarious self-portrait photos in the style of Flemish Renaissance paintings. She calls the series “Seat Assignment: Lavatory Self-Portraits in the Flemish Style.”

Greg Barris Goes To Jail - Heart of Darkness - 3.17.12 from Karmalize Productions on Vimeo.

If your birthday is any day except February 29, you share your birthday with approximately 1/365 of any population (0.274%).
Therefore, since the world population as of this writing is estimated at 7 billion you share your birthday with over 19 million people around the world (19,178,082).
Here are how many people you share your birthday with for countries around the world:
You currently share your birthday with about 859,178 people who reside in the United States. On a grand scale, you share your birthday with about 3.7 million Chinese and 3.2 million Indians. About 94,473 Canadians share a birthday as do 170,684 Brits and 445,126 Nigerians.

The title says "Guitarist for Metal Band", not "Guitarist for chicken fucking, bluesy-riffs, and sonic diarrhea"

As a baby, when you’re born, passing through the vagina, you’re infected by the bacteria in your mother’s colon

When a rep tries to go directly to the client
I’m like

"A man with a briefcase arrives in a place called City-A looking like a double agent from 1973: mustachioed and trenchcoated, forever ducking into phone booths for cryptic conversations. The man, Mr. Holz, is a geophysicist of unknown origin. He has come here to work for the New Method Oil Well Cementing Company. City-A is mesmerizingly bleak, a grid of concrete high-rises set between a brackish sea and a wintry industrial wasteland, all of it reeking of environmental contamination and failed utopia. Many things, Holz notices, are amiss here. Clocks don’t run sixty seconds to the minute in City-A. The drinking water is spiked with lithium, a shadowy entity has confiscated his passport, language is rationed, and what exactly is this New Method Oil Well Cementing Company, anyway? As the bewildered-looking Holz moves through the city, is he piecing together clues to solve these mysteries or just being shuttled around by a powerful unseen force?

This, roughly, is the storyline of whiteonwhite:algorithmicnoir, the new film by Eve Sussman and the Rufus Corporation. But because this noir is, as the title promises, algorithmic, the film has no beginning, middle, or end. At each screening, a computer program live-edits a movie out of more than three thousand film clips, eighty voice-overs, and 150 pieces of music. Each of these movable parts is marked with loosely content-related tags (“horizon,” “anxiety,” “white”), and the computer fits the pieces together according to an algorithm that matches tags. Sussman calls this apparatus the “serendipity machine.” Containing more than thirty hours of material, the movie never comes together the same way twice, and it never loops. A small screen to the side runs the metadata of the algorithm while the film plays, reminding viewers that a computer is chugging away busily as they watch, matching “discomfort” tags to “discomfort” tags, “surveillance” to “surveillance.”"

Deborah Stevens said her former employer, Atlantic Automotive Group, discriminated against her over disabilities brought about by complications from the surgery, and she plans to sue the company for lost earnings and damages.

The company, which runs car dealerships on Long Island, said Stevens's complaint is groundless.

"My gal is just a good-natured woman who's trying to save a life and as soon as she did it, everything changed," said Stevens' attorney Lenard Leeds on Tuesday.

"When she wanted to take time off, she was scolded, she was yelled at," he said. "Instead of being sympathetic, they were very hostile towards her."

Evidence suggests that lower staff levels and training at private facilities may lead to increases in incidences of violence and escapes. A nationwide study found that assaults on guards by inmates were 49 percent more frequent in private prisons than in government-run prisons. The same study revealed that assaults on fellow inmates were 65 percent more frequent in private prisons.

Since 2004, Seattle attorney Andrew Basiago has been publicly claiming that from the time he was 7 to when he was 12, he participated in "Project Pegasus," a secret U.S. government program that he says worked on teleportation and time travel under the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency.
"They trained children along with adults so they could test the mental and physical effects of time travel on kids," Basiago told The Huffington Post. "Also, children had an advantage over adults in terms of adapting to the strains of moving between past, present and future."

Basiago said he experienced eight different time travel technologies during his stint in the program. Mostly, he said, his travel involved a teleporter based on technical papers supposedly found in pioneering mechanical engineer Nikola Tesla's New York City apartment after his death in January 1943.
"The machine consisted of two gray elliptical booms about eight feet tall, separated by about 10 feet, between which a shimmering curtain of what Tesla called 'radiant energy' was broadcast," Basiago said. "Radiant energy is a form of energy that Tesla discovered that is latent and pervasive in the universe and has among its properties the capacity to bend time-space."
Basiago said project participants would jump through this field of radiant energy into a vortal tunnel and "when the tunnel closed, we found ourselves at our destination."
"One felt either as if one was moving at a great rate of speed or moving not at all, as the universe was wrapped around one's location," Basiago said.
Basiago claimed he can be seen in a photograph of Abraham Lincoln at Gettysburg in 1863, which he said he visited in 1972 via a plasma confinement chamber located in East Hanover, N.J.

You know what? I'm sick of pretending. I went to art school, wrote a dissertation called "The Elevation of Art Through Commerce: An Analysis of Charles Saatchi's Approach to the Machinery of Art Production Using Pierre Bourdieu's Theories of Distinction", have attended art openings at least once a month for the last five years, even fucking purchased pieces of it, but the other night, after attending the opening of the new Tracey Emin retrospective at the Hayward Gallery, I'm finally ready to come out and say it: I just don't think I "get" art.

“Yo Mr. Cody, how many these mushrooms I gotta eat fo’ I Super Mario da fuck outta dis place?”

— Ghetto Hikes (@GhettoHikes) February 17, 2012

The ‘E’ Tyranny is a futuristic socio-political thriller and an intelligent zombie-apocalypse epic; intertwining the drama and horror of the zombie genre’s best, The Walking Dead, with the philosophical and moral ideas and insights of Ayn Rand, in the vein of her classic sci-fi novel Atlas Shrugged, which is also set in a dystopian America.
Rand argues in her novels that our ability to reason and exercise rational control over our emotions is the distinguishing mark of our humanity and individuality. So it is that, in the aftermath of an outbreak of bio-engineered contagion that collectively zombiefies the masses; the last remaining unaffected people, the ‘Rationals,’ are caught in an ongoing struggle with the aggressive and uncontrollable ‘Emotionals.’

You will give me:

Chanel and Louis Vuitton handbags

Diamond and Gold jewelry

An aparmtent in Manhattan

A house in Miami

A fancy car

A color gel French manucure and pedicure (every week)


You will pay to have me sing to your party, reception, cocktail (cause yeah I can sing). I only consider the best offers $$$$$.

Titled Death and Metamorphosis, the performance was to take place this week at a small theatre in Spandau. The artist – who has not been identified – planned to use cable ties to strangle the dogs, followed by a brief meditation accompanied by funeral procession music and a giant gong.

The performance, reportedly based on traditional Thai performance art, was intended, the artist said, as a protest against the killing of sled dogs in Alaska and hunting dogs in Spain after they are deemed unfit to work.