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  1.  (11117.1)
    It's Thursday! It's mid-afternoon in London! It's another wrongheaded morning in Mericky! It's who-the-fuck-knows-when in Australia! It's time for more Crossed Hideosity!

    Episode 54, live and free-to-air.

    Remember: Not safe for work, not safe for minors, not safe for people of a nervous disposition, not safe for old oak common, not safe for FRONTIER, not safe for coverly.

    SHITGETTINREELAH
  2.  (11117.2)
    God damn it I love Jackson. Oh, and "...fuck...mah...balls..." had me in stitches, by the way.

    Can't wait to see the outcome of this cliffhanger. Obviously Des and plenty of the others are on board with the drift fleet, but now it looks like Shaky might be considering it?

    I can understand the short term appeal of the drift fleet -- New people, new setting, beer and chickens, etc. I'm not going to lie... in the apocalyptic world of the crossed, I might shove a grenade up Don's ass and go running for the drift fleet just for a frosty pint, but it seems like Cava is a pretty secure place to live in the world of plussies... and intelligent alpha plussies. Aside from Cava's natural defenses, they've also seemed to set up an effective lookout system and defensive perimeter. As safe as the drift fleet seems right now, I'm sure they still have enough chinks in their armor that require a constant vigilance. And as we've all seen, it's certainly not unheard of for a group of crossed to man a motor boat... or send out explosive cattle to sabotage some normals. Didn't the nun's crossed have rocket launchers at some point too? Fuuuuuck that. If shit goes wrong on a ship, splashing around in water for my dear life is the last thing I would want to do. Land = security.

    As far as supplies go... Both parties farm and raise livestock. Cava-ites go out on sorties. Drifters make oil runs. Seems like equally dangerous tasks to me.

    I don't know. As much as I hate to side with Don, I'm not seeing the overwhelming appeal of the drift fleet.... other than beer and new pieces of ass to stare at (for both the men and the ladies.)
  3.  (11117.3)
    Oh those evil Americans bribing people with burgers and going after their oil and buying their guns....its like the Crossed never happened. Heh, but I do like the reveal about the Big Bertha and this effort to making the Boat people a viable society instead of just another horror.
  4.  (11117.4)
    Shaky's baby is more valuable than guns OR oil. And that empty envelope? Did the Nun read Shaky's letter? Did she recognize him?
  5.  (11117.5)
    Agreed. Shaky's thinking about his unborn "wee bairn", for sure... as well as the fact that no babies have survived long after birth on the drift fleet.

    I think some peeps hit the nail(s) on the head in the previous thread regarding Seline's cryptic ramblings -- Seline was kept alive to convey a message to Shaky. The (assumed) message is instrumental in arranging a meeting between Shaky and the nun. So Seline is essentially just a messenger... or basically a letter, in a way. Perhaps the empty envelope is just a symbol to drive that point home. Empty envelope in the pocket of a living breathing message? OR the empty envelope is for Shaky to write a return message to the nun with a specific time to meet?

    I think it's obvious at this point that the nun recognizes Shaky, don't you? She was suggestively waving one of his messages in the air from across the inlet, several chapters back.
    • CommentAuthorSlicknick
    • CommentTimeJul 11th 2013
     (11117.6)
    Man what a great week for crossed. this episode was amazing, Seline was the message i believe I just don't know what her ramblings mean. all the dead bodies on flotta had x's carved in them, i think its clear the nun knows where shaky is.

    jackson 10/10

    and on the badlands side of things, while i have to admit SI is my favorite crossed writer, christos gage is now i think the second best contributor edging out ennis, the last badlands arc is my favorite in the whole series. I just wish i knew what Oliver read in those files. any ideas? mysterious mysterious mysteries.

    And Si I cant wait to read disenchanted looks really interesting.
    • CommentAuthorblighty
    • CommentTimeJul 11th 2013
     (11117.7)
    @Slicknick Gage's Badlands arc was awesome, he is right there with Spurrier and Ennis. Oliver says what he saw in the files - There was a bunch of communication regarding the efforts by the military to secure / destroy dangerous facilities(nuclear reactors, bio-weapon factories, etc) before they could be taken by the Crossed. They managed to get to some but not all of them. Oliver saw that there was a list of the places that had not been seen to yet. That was what he didn't want Smokey to find.

    @VoteForDuvall I am thinking that the Nun wants Shaky to write down a time a place for a meeting, put it in the envelope, and leave it at Clay Loan(that street in Kirkwall someone in a previous thread identified).

    Great episode today. The only thing I am finding a little hard to swallow is: How did the Nun know that Jackson was going to Flotta so she could leave Seline there to be found?
    •  
      CommentAuthorjohnjones
    • CommentTimeJul 11th 2013
     (11117.8)
    How did the Nun know that Jackson was going to Flotta so she could leave Seline there to be found?


    She didn't have to know he was coming there. Once the Crossed spotted him, she probably had them lay Seline out and light some bottles to attract his attention.
    • CommentAuthorSlicknick
    • CommentTimeJul 11th 2013
     (11117.9)
    @blightly

    ahhh i see that now i missed that, that makes sense.. I wonder when we'll get to see the crossed alpha's team up. Smokey and the twins + the nun. and there has to be way more we don't even know about yet too bad horsecock bit it. in fact i bet that will be the next wave of crossed books over the next year.
    •  
      CommentAuthorkzootron
    • CommentTimeJul 11th 2013 edited
     (11117.10)
    @Sicknick-I also agree that Gage's "quisling" arc was epic, but as far as coming close to Ennis? Not possible. Ennis made this universe afterall. No I truly believe that Garth and Simon are the best at writing in the Crossed world. I just hope Gage does some more badlands arc's cause his last one was amazing! If Gage writes more in the crossed universe then maybe he can share the stage with Garth and Si.

    Now as far as leaving the island for the driftfleet? Hard choice. The currents around Cava make for great natural defenses for most small boats and yachts and such. But what if a cruise ship full of crossed went full speed at the island? I imagine not only would they beat the currents they would probably beach the ship all the way on the island. I mean...imagine a luxury cruise ship filled with crossed? Just saying.
  6.  (11117.11)
    what I liked about Gage's Badlands arc was that he referenced much from the other books before him - almost paying tribute in a way, realizing that he is a newcomer to this universe.
    he refers to the soldiers destroying power plants and nuclear facilities, he refers to the "smart" twin girls from FL... all very interesting. and the story he had to tell was definitely unique and interesting. all of these reveal bits and pieces of the overall universe and story. whereas David Lapham's stories are just... bleh.

    re: the current WYWH storyline, it's all just very confusing. why the nun is what she is (crossed, but not crossed? an "X" face instead of a plus?), how they can keep Seline around without turning her, what their intentions are with the survivors on Cava and their being able to hold off from attacking them... I know this will all turn into a brilliant payoff.
    • CommentAuthorBadBeast
    • CommentTimeJul 12th 2013
     (11117.12)
    This episode receives my personal recommendation for some kind of "Most overdue sentence of dialogue" award.
    Some things just need to be said, and "Shut the fuck up or I'll break your neck" should have been something that was said to Don a long time ago. I forget what his original contribution was to the group, and why he was considered fit for any kind of leadership role, but surely it must have been something other than just being the most dour, petty minded old tosspot left alive in the entire post-cross universe. It's certainly not because of his charismatic "born to lead" personality type is it? Or indeed, his "people skills".

    There may well be some underlying and as yet, un-expanded upon skill-set, or some hidden dynamic that only he holds the key to, but speaking for myself, I very much doubt it. His role in the plot seems disproportionate to any actual contribution he's made, or is likely to make, so can we please have him die an imaginatively and suitably macabre death really soon? (If only to justify his having survived for so long, on so little that is either likable, or interesting)

    Horsecock (whose untimely death was, in my opinion a shocking waste of a character) was more interesting and charismatic than Don, and all he ever said of any note, was "Horsecock". At least he was entertaining, and always had a cheerful, sunny smile on his face. He also had a commendable tenacity and strength of purpose that along with any other qualities of character, seems absent in Don.

    Maybe I'm getting too critical in my old age, but (except for Don) every character Spurrier has brought to Crossed so far, has been well defined enough for purpose and relevance, then suitably dispensed with once their trope has played out. But with all due respect, I think this Don cove has slipped under the relevance radar somehow and now needs to be vindicated in a gory, sexually inventive and entertaining death.

    So I can leave that with you Si, yes? Good lad, I don't care what everyone else thinks, I think you're a brilliant writer and "Crossed" wouldn't have nearly so much gravitas without you. Don't get me wrong, Garth is capable of greatness too, but since hitting his creative peak with "Hitman", seems to have been resting on his laurels somewhat, and no longer lifts like he did. But I hope he recovers his acuity and proves my concerns to be unfounded. OK, bye for now then. L8rz, BB.
    • CommentAuthorSlicknick
    • CommentTimeJul 12th 2013
     (11117.13)
    @BB

    Horsecock's sunny disposition and love of classic rock truly defined his character as a man to striving just to be. would that when our world descends to hell we all share his frankly heartwarming demeanor and appreciation of wildlife.
    •  
      CommentAuthorjohnjones
    • CommentTimeJul 13th 2013
     (11117.14)
    I forget what his original contribution was to the group, and why he was considered fit for any kind of leadership role, but surely it must have been something other than just being the most dour, petty minded old tosspot left alive in the entire post-cross universe.


    No, that's pretty much his contribution and that contribution is massive and vital. Don is a pessimist, suspicious and cautious by nature. He constantly and continually expects and prepares for the worst. Think back to the death of the fellow in the barbed wire in the first volume when Don harshly noted that those people who were most likely to volunteer for the sortie were exactly the people that Cava could least afford to lose.

    Here, Don knows damned well that the driftfleet is essentially a false hope. He knows that it's too big to hide and that Flotta oil or not, it's doomed and so is everyone who goes with it. The driftfleet, to Don, is the death of Cava either through everyone eventually dying on the driftfleet or through there being too few people to defend and work Cava once the fleet is gone. Don is Cassandra, desperately warning against disaster and being ignored.
    • CommentAuthorKarl
    • CommentTimeJul 13th 2013 edited
     (11117.15)
    @johnjones

    You might be right with that. However, it seems to be pretty clear that Dons motives are not so pure. He is very comfortable with his leadership position on cava, this is his main concern. So he is doing the right thing for the wrong reasons, I believe.

    Anyhow, I love this comic.
  7.  (11117.16)
    Rab is George Washington--the reluctant default military commander who speaks softly but isn't afraid go bust yer face if you get out of line. Respected by all, he seeks consensus before making decisions, and makes them with great care and deliberation.

    Don is John Adams--the egotist who wants to wear a crown and be called King. Unpopular and disliked, but NEEDED simply because he's probably the smartest, the slipperiest, and he has the best grasp of the situation. But he is rash to judgment and undiplomatic.

    It remains to be seen if Shaky is Thomas Jefferson or Benedict Arnold.
    • CommentAuthorBadBeast
    • CommentTimeJul 13th 2013
     (11117.17)
    Shaky is more your Ben Franklin type. Reluctant participant, wishes everyone would just fuck off and leave him alone to do whatever, with keys or kites. But he can't resist stirring the pot, beccause he's a greedy little attention whore at heart. Leaving notes all over the shop, playing covert politics, writing everything down in his notebooks.

    "How I wrote the Constitution" ~ Shaky Franklin.
    "How I started a Tea Party in Boston~ Gen S.Franklin esq
    How I abolished Slavery forever, on Cava" ~Shakes. (P.R)
    "How I slew the evil Gamekeeper" ~ Shaky Rapebane
    "How I killed Jackson's Bagpipes ~Shaky McSporran

    Shaky is making myths, for posterity. But he has no illusions about there being anyone to read them. So, to make up for that, he's cast himself in the role of Hero/Moralfag/Executioner/White Knght/Virile Stud/Fearless Leader. And anything else he can hin of. Maybe "Admiral Shaky Pipeslayer, First Sealord of the Drift Pirate's Oil Fleet".
    "Shaky McPoontang, Saviour of Mankind, and Gene Laird of the Western Isles"
    "Shaky McPimpslap, ruler of teh Laydeez"

    Probably end up more like Sawney "Shakes" Bean, and his happy Clan of Cave dwelling cannibals. But feeling better than the rest because they're not Crossed. They eat people, inbreed with each other's progeny,, Murder passers by for food, not sexual grtification. But it's OK, because thanks to the Shakin' Man, at least thev'e still got their humanity. (Hanging up on butchers hooks, at the back of the cave) What better way to preserve Mankind? As Parma Hams, Flitches of Bacon, and Jerked Longpig. Heil Shaky, Silencer of Lambs.
    • CommentAuthorBadBeast
    • CommentTimeJul 13th 2013
     (11117.18)
    (I know, "Keeping it classy, Mr Beast")
  8.  (11117.19)
    I knew if I pushed your buttons you'd come up with something truly brilliant, Beast. Holy shit.
    • CommentAuthormaxnutter
    • CommentTimeJul 18th 2013
     (11117.20)
    @dirtynouveau - I don't know why the nun doesn't have the typical '+' lesions, but the 'X' was carved into her face by the gamekeeper, pre-infection...

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