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    • CommentTimeDec 1st 2013
    Welcome to the bar.

    You can think of myself as a bartender, keeping the place clean while the boss is out of town if that helps. And Taphead is the local musician who will play a song to match your mood. know, whatever.

    Here's the place for you to tell us how you've been and what you've been up to.

    Here we go.

    The Rules:

    The THREE ACT SPEAKEASY is here for you to vent, to express, and to learn. This is your chance to perform -- but you're also in the audience, guv, and are expected to behave as such. So your skits at the steely Whitechapel microphone will ALL and ALWAYS be divided into three sections:

    1: The Boo. The Get-It-Off-Your-Chest. The "I've-Had-A-Shit-Week-And-I-Need-To-Vent". Your chance to scream silently into the face of Internet apathy, and trepan your pressurized consciousness. Deposit your spleen here.

    2: The Huzzah. Wherein you tell us something which goes just a teensy way to mitigating the effects of the psychic turd you just laid on our heads. Perhaps it's a tiny hint of hope in an otherwise bleak situation. Perhaps it's an unrelated Thing Which Happened which made you smile rather than frown. Shit, maybe it's just a silly joke. Show us you can cope as well as carp.

    3: The Applause. You will choose one of your fellow whitechapellers, from this same thread. Doesn't have to be the person who posted before you - just someone whose story touched you. And you will offer them a word of advice, or comfort, or support, to help them with their own SECTION 1 Whinge. Doesn't have to be much. A sentence, a word, a bloody emoticon - whatever. Just a paltry donation to the art of Thinking Of Others. And try to avoid schmaltz, please, or the Urethral Maggots will feast anew. Circle of life, kids.

    ALSO, because we need to do it more often and because I am old and forgetful, show me a picture of yourself if you want. I'd like to put a face to the words. And no cross-posting from the SPIT thread, either. I'll know.

    Naturally, the first person to respond here is excused from Stage 3.

    • CommentTimeDec 1st 2013
    In my attempt to follow the rules, I shall blatantly disregard the rules. See my post from last night, in the previous thread. Thus, now, a post entirely made up of applesauce:

    Glukkake: is it possible your mom secretly wants you to be a bodybuilder and just doesn't know how to say it?
    I'm sure you're on the tumblrs so you've seen all the great dissections of television-bodies and book-descriptions-of-female-bodies and weird-standards-for-numbers-that-mean-nothing (the takedown of the Pacific Rim blonde was my personal favourite).

    Fauxhammer: Seriously, if you need to talk to anyone who's been through it, don't hesitate to contact me. I sound like a broken record, but, make sure you get those deep conversations in while you can, even if neither of you are the "deep" type. I regret some things about my dad's final days.

    Also, Robin: I'm watching Alias right now. And Charmed. Over Halloween I was into witches, so I got The Craft and some other crap. Then I remembered Charmed, and then I realized it would be great to revisit the "strong, independent women" of my childhood television-watching (Buffy excepted, I've rewatched the entire series in the last five years, thanks MuchMoreMusic). Alias is surprisingly good for its obvious emotional-drama-ness and the fact that the tech is just as implausible now as it is then. The action is satisfying and the techno-house on all the spy scenes is hilarious. /tv-spew
    • CommentAuthordnewling
    • CommentTimeDec 1st 2013
    I haven't been here for a while, so it's nice to be back. I guess that's one yay.

    Boo: the ringing in my ear just won't go away. Yes, an ear infection. I hope it stops before my prescription runs out. And Mum has shingles. We think she is over the worst, but the road to recovery is slow and she still feels pain.

    Yay: summer has officially started here and the weather is gorgeous. I'm looking forward to the holiday we've got booked. We're going to have Christmas on holiday, so the tree comes with us!
    • CommentTimeDec 2nd 2013
    Special December Non-Debbie Downer Edition!

    Bad: With the management's kind permission, I'd like to skip this for now.

    Good: Looking forward to my trip to Boston, despite the circumstances. I am going to have real pizza, real American Chinese food, and I'm going to take a shitload of reference photos for my novels' setting, in case it's ever illustrated. I haven't been back in eight years, and it'll be good to walk the grim, grey fields of home.

    I took the day off to sit with my dad, but not before I play a shitload of video games and maybe nap a bit.

    Applause: @allana: I appreciate it, seriously. I had The Talk with him yesterday, and I don't know how much he got; if it was just for me, that's fine.

    @denwling: Shingles ain't nothing to fuck wit. Hope she feels better soon.
    • CommentAuthordnewling
    • CommentTimeDec 2nd 2013
    @Fauxhammer. Thank you. And I hope you have a great time in Boston! I take it that's your Christmas holiday as well as research for the novel?
    • CommentTimeDec 2nd 2013
    all i have right now is i've booked my flights to toronto...
    • CommentTimeDec 2nd 2013
    Hey all, it's been a while, but suddenly, tonight, it got pretty dark in my heart. I don't know exactly what it is, I am been generally upbeat for the better part of the year but as the end is closing in I cannot help but think about everything that continued to not happen.

    As I mentioned, to date, 2013 has been one of my favorite years, new degree, new job, new hobbies. Hopefully this funk will pass soon.

    @dnewling I do hope the ears and the shingles pass, I've had plenty of the first and know how rough they can be. I hope that they pass soon.
    • CommentAuthordnewling
    • CommentTimeDec 3rd 2013
    @Beamish: thank you.
  1.  (11211.9)
    @Beams-it's not just you. Might be the season but I went from great to shit in about 10 minutes and haven't perked up yet. I guess it's the season of regrets, when we are reminded of the old horrors that haven't left us, but let us think they were gone.

    Good: I love my 2nd Job, and I've found peace with my first- security in place, at least. I've got friends at the coffee shop, and amazing ideas in my head. BIG ideas. Huge ideas that get bigger and bigger. So at least my imagination isn't dead? And I got a new reference book for anatomy with lovely, interesting-angled skulls. And I'm glad I have you guys, my internet family. Better than nothing, right?

    Bad: and very little energy to write those ideas down or draw. The divorce got stopped and stepdad's started being an ass again, and mom's trying to be nice ? But tends to go from ok to not in 5 seconds. Winter's hit, and while this year I'm warm, my knees are bastards, full of aches and creaks and burning sensations. Again, I feel alone out here in the middle of nowhere. Because i am. I cling to the internet like an addict- but it's not just words I miss. It's connection-- and that's what the family doesn't understand.
    • CommentTimeDec 4th 2013
    Got home a little while ago after four days away. The bed smells like pee and is a little humid. Went through to the mattress, past the fitted sheet, the bed lining (and out to the side), through the cushion under the sheet and into the mattress.

    I've been sharing my bed (spectacularly large Cal King) with my 11 yr old niece since she and my sister, bro in law (and their cat & dog) moved in. It was that or the kid slept on the couch and had no room of her own. I think this might be the fifth time I came home to find the bed like this. Clearly she's stressed out from moving, and all other family insanity, but the kid is off at science camp; she left on Monday. So it's been sitting here this way for a couple days. Bloody great. I'm fucking exhausted. Curl up in a dry corner of the bed or go out to the couch where the cat is? (I'm allergic.)

    I've been crashing with friends while I work on my show in Los Angeles. Friends are rad and generous, but that also means other friends drop by at any time of day or night. It's cool but also exhausting. Other times when I've worked on my plays it's been nice to go to their house to get away from home - traditional Catholic parents, schizophrenic brother - and then after a few days get away from them and the 24/7 unlocked door that I slept next to and come home to my comfy bed. *sigh* But now my comfy bed smells awful.

    I don't have alternatives. I just get to live with this until I strike it rich voice acting or something. In other words, god knows. Fuck, I'm tired.

    And the funny things is, I look at all this and I'm keenly aware that it could be worse. I've lost so much ground... I know more could still be lost. So I'm glad I've got this much and hope nothing happens to it.

    Cranking up some voice acting. Have finally made auditioning something I do almost as often as going to the gym. Both could stand to improve a lot. Have a great class I'm attending for the next two weeks. The show is going well and people have complimented me on my work. Pretty sweet.

    Making just enough money on this gig to have the unfun need to make some choices. Buy stuff I've been meaning to purchase? Sign up for classes? Repair the truck? Christmas presents? So many options, so little I can actually do.

    @Root- *hug* Through the internet, connecting peeps in the dark distances....
    @Beam *hug* It's cool. Enjoy the good stuff, but don't be too hard on yourself if the good can't be felt on demand.
    • CommentTimeDec 4th 2013
    My dad died yesterday. I went to his house and paid my respects, and he looked...well, he looked beautiful. The hard part was watching him decline. He had this bewildered, frustrated look on his face that was just wiped away. He left me his fire helmet, some badges, and his commemorative medal from a fire he was in back in 1972.

    All is well, all is wall, and all manner of things will be well.
    • CommentTimeDec 4th 2013
    so i've decided 2013 can fuck off...

    after splitting up with my girlfriend of over 7 years. then getting back together we are now firmly finished... its messy and hard and it hurts.

    i'm staying out at my mothers house in the coutryside until... well i dunno when.

    so as a sign of power to myself i'm heading to toronto for a week after my birthday in january.

    i have no job and no girlfriend and i think i'm gonna murder my mother...

    jeez this can just fuck off
    • CommentTimeDec 4th 2013
    Hugs all around.
    • CommentTimeDec 4th 2013
    I got hit by a car while on my bike. Hit. By. A. Car. So weird to see it spelled out. I basically got merged into while in a bike lane. I'm banged up, but no serious injuries. The kid in the beat up pickup that hit me was freaking out, but I got him to calm down enough to give me, and my now broken bike, a ride home. Anxiety and depression continue to be an issue. It just leeches all the color and joy out of life when it's around. I tried a bunch of different meds for the first time this year, but they all either did nothing helpful or the side effects made their continued use untenable.

    The job's going ... ok. Boring, but ok. We all got profit sharing bonuses based on seniority and we had a really good, profitable year apparently. I am surrounded by wonderful, loving friends and family. My son turns 7 in a few weeks. He's a huge source of joy in my life. My partner is understanding an supportive. Cool, right?

    It's all about you, baby:
    Beamish - I feel your pain, m'friend. If you ever spiral down while in that funk, please reach out. I'm more than happy to talk and sympathize as a fellow "funk" sufferer.
    Fauxhammer - My condolences to you and your family. I also love the quote you used. It's been a comfort to me since read The Talisman as a kid. (I only recently learned the quote is from Julian of Norwich.)
  2.  (11211.15)
    hey there everyone! Been away for a little while (again). Need to stop roaming the digital wild like a bloody caveman, and back home here more often. So.... what's been happening with me then?

    Still no kids. And with everyone around Sigga getting pregnant or having babies, she has been really down about this. CAN PEOPLE PLEASE STOP HAVING KIDS, ok? seriously, it's starting to get very annoying!

    There seems to be something "wrong" happening to the friendship I have with an old friend of mine in Iceland. she's has a hard year (Heavy knee surgery. Problems finding work. general bouts of depression) but everything was fine until just over a month or so ago when the Iceland Airwaves festival was going on. It was my night off from writing and I was on the sauce, so when I met her I was pretty hammered, but she was not in a good mood as someone had banged heavily into her bad knee. Things were a little hazy, but it seems that nothing untoward happened. But since then she seems to be spurning all contact with me. Calls, e-mails and txts go unanswered. I did manage to get in touch once, and it was reaaaally awkward, as if there was something bad that had happened. It´s really getting to me, because I'm really not sure what is going on. What's weird is that I've spoken to her husband Siggi who we still out together, and it seems she's having a rough time of it and is being very unsociable and not going out. But even, so This has me concerned. Really concerned as we've such good friends for so long. I may need to risk it by confronting her about this.


    I start University in 4 weeks time to do Film Studies and Icelandic! And I frankly can't wait as my job is almost metaphysically killing me from the inside. I'm now registered, tuition fees are paid, currently butting heads with the student loans company (They always need more proof) and I'm buying course texts in advance. Sometimes I stop and just let it sink in - Jesus, I'm going to be a fucking dosser student! It's scary, and exciting to be actually spending a lot of time thinking and exploring culture. I should have done this shit 20 years ago...


    @Fauxhammer: Hey Chris. I saw your posts on FB this week and it's the worst feeling in the world losing someone you love. I´m really sorry for your loss. I thought about jotting down a note on FB, but it just felt kinda trite at the time to do that, so sorry about that. We're all here for you and time will help things out, trust me on this.

    @Beamish: Jason, hang in there mate. As Chiaslut has mentioned, there are many people here who know exactly what it feels like when that darkness threatens to wrap itself around you (little confession. I've been off work for two days now. I've told them I've had mild food poisoning. I am not feeling well, but it ain't food poisoning). If you need to speak to, or IM anyone about this, just buzz me up and we can shoot the shit, OK?

    @Alastair: Man, that really sucks right now. And also living with your mother as well is certainly not easy. Try to keep it up till you get to Toronto. I´m sure that things will be great when you'Re there and you can at least unwind and relax a little bit.

    And toe veryone else. Be good, be happy, and have wonderful times living your life!
    • CommentTimeDec 4th 2013
    cheers bob, you're good people. i wanna see little bobs!
    • CommentAuthor98357
    • CommentTimeDec 9th 2013 edited
    [REDACTED - taphead]

    Sympathy - for you all I'm afraid. Alastair is not who you think her is. He wanted me to hate him, I hope he's happy with the results....
    • CommentTimeDec 9th 2013
    Oookay. While this is definitely the thread for airing one's laundry, that's not the way we do things.

    Believe me, I can understand the shitstorm breakups can kick up, but that was merrily skipping across the line of Forum Rule #1 and when it went to actually naming names (whether factual or not) we're well into the no-no.

    These are tough times, so my sympathies to both of you.
    • CommentAuthor98357
    • CommentTimeDec 9th 2013
    I don't care, that's all I came here to do.
    • CommentTimeDec 9th 2013
    Then go.