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    • CommentAuthorRedwynd
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    I am a figment of your Warren Ellis/Chuck Palahnuik-induced psychological trauma.

    Whose holding the bowel disruptor now, bitch?

    (I've waited years to say that)
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007 edited
    (I apologise for this in advance)

    I'm the Goddamn Batman.

  1.  (173.63)
    I am a rootless cosmopolitan.
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    The founder of still pays me a sizeable sum every year for an undisclosed reason.
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    I am in a pact with Matt Damon whereby when one or both of us has had enough of this world and its pleasures, we shall meet atop a secret mountain and fight to the death. Whomever survives gets to kill Ben Affleck.
  2.  (173.66)
    I believe every word you said.
  3.  (173.67)
    I have a pony.

    It is pink.

    like my soul.
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    I've had rabies 13 times.
  4.  (173.69)
    I want the proportionate powers of an irradiated God bestowed upon me by a bite, yet live in constant terror of being attacked by a Gamma-irradiated Zombie Hulk. Oh, wait, that's the truth...

    Sometimes, as the moon's rising, I dress like Galactus and terrorizes helpless aliens with threats of cannibalism.
  5.  (173.70)
    I'm having a time out until I can learn some manners.
    Jesus once paid me to break it off with his mother.
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    I can divide by zero.
      CommentAuthorDoc Ocassi
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    I am the result of an immaculate conception, as is my father.
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    We are Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.

    Well, close anyway. I'm not Borg but I'm the next best thing.
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    I eat gods. No really, Yahweh tastes like pork.

    Except for Eris and Cthulhu, I don't fuck with them...

    @The Skoot - So that explains his random bouts of decent acting and sanity.
    • CommentAuthorcaiasward
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007

    Yeah, I invented it. Had a problem with the flammable hydrogen, so I just tossed some more subatomic matter in there and we were good. The high voice thing is just a benefit at parties.

    Oh, and the Rear Naked Choke?

    That one is mine too.
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007 edited
    As a result of an interestingly synchronous grouping of events during my birth involving a particle accelerator, a half-digested piece of bacon eaten by my mother during the meal previous, and an RN on duty that night who was secretly devoted to Eris and Her Mysteries, I am able with only a compass and straight-edge to square the circle, double the cube and trisect the angle.
  6.  (173.77)
  7.  (173.78)
    I was the inspiration for G.I. Joe, Transformers, and Thundercats.

    The creators of Go-Bots still owe me money.
    • CommentAuthorThe Skoot
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    @ ravnos - Yeah. I was going to make him do some crazy shit, then realised that the best way to fuck with people would be to just act normal.
    • CommentTimeDec 6th 2007
    A lie (in drabble form):

    My legal name is <a href="">Z</a>, I even have a passport that says so. I have, in addition to my comics collection, a collection of fanboy memorabilia, including: Steve Niles’ baby teeth, Warren Ellis’ first doll, a bib stained with Wil Wheaton’s baby vomit, and Joss Whedon’s first box of crayons. There are court cases pending for the return of these items, and civil suits pending for repair of a few broken windows. These will be minor details when they realise I am their number one fan.

    I don’t use <a href="">MySpace</a>, and no-one listens to me.
    <a href="">
    - Z</a>

This discussion has been inactive for longer than 5 days, and doesn't want to be resurrected.