Dr Nick Troop, principal lecturer in health psychology at the University of Hertfordshire, and an avid David Bowie fan, analysed the singer's 266 songs for links between language used and success in the charts, and then wrote what he considered to be the ideal song to guarantee commercial success and improve the health of the singer...
Well he's only got two elements here; The voice and the twelve string. Essential elements to be sure, but I think it needs the pop 'hook' element to be complete.
And the majority of his successful singles have been of the upbeat variety, so I'm surprised he went ahead and tried to do a slow ballad. And like Val side, no hook.