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  1.  (8001.1)

    From The Seattle Times:
    VANCOUVER, Wash. — After nearly five decades, guys like James Noce finally get to tell their stories about Area 51.

    Yes, that Area 51.

    The one that gets brought up when people talk about secret Air Force projects, crashed UFOs, alien bodies and, of course, conspiracies.

    The secrets, some of them, have been declassified.

    Noce, 72, and his fellow Area 51 veterans around the country now are free to talk about doing contract work for the CIA in the 1960s and '70s at the arid, isolated Southern Nevada government testing site.

    Their stories shed some light on a site shrouded in mystery; classified projects still are going on there. It's not a big leap from warding off the curious 40 or 50 years ago, to warding off the curious who now make the drive to Area 51.

    The veterans' stories provide a glimpse of real-life government covert operations, with their everyday routines and moments of excitement.

    [...]

    Advance warning to UFOlogists: Sorry, although Noce and other Area 51 vets say they saw plenty of secret stuff, none make claims about aliens.
    • CommentAuthorSteadyUP
    • CommentTimeApr 2nd 2010
     (8001.2)
    Well, duh - those parts of their minds were wiped.
    • CommentAuthor256
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2010
     (8001.3)
    I wonder if the rights have been optioned yet.
  2.  (8001.4)
    Well, duh - those parts of their minds were wiped.
    And the alien experiments would no doubt fall under the 'still classified on-going projects' stuff that nobody is allowed to talk about. And everybody knows they moved the aliens to Maine sometime in the early 90's, anyway.
    •  
      CommentAuthorcosta_k
    • CommentTimeApr 3rd 2010
     (8001.5)
    Very cool article.
  3.  (8001.6)
    This only works if you assume that an organization that thrives on lies and deceit is being honest/forthcoming.
    •  
      CommentAuthorAlan Tyson
    • CommentTimeApr 5th 2010
     (8001.7)
    And everybody knows they moved the aliens to Maine sometime in the early 90's, anyway.

    I've heard lots of fun stuff about how the bodies have been somewhere under Wright Patterson Airbase in Dayton since the mid-'80s. I heard this around the time I was living there, as an impressionable youth, with my dad working at said airbase. Probably informed my nature a bit.
  4.  (8001.8)
    Last credible bit of info regarding evil I've heard about Area 51 is as follows: As the base is top secret, and does not officially exist, much of what is created on said base does not leave. Skipping ahead a lenghty bit, there's allegedly alot of radioactive waste burried beneath there, causing employees to develop cancer, and sterility, and the like. Obviously, don't know how true this is, but it's a bit more cause for concern than the Rosewell stuff, which I had stopped caring about quite some time ago. Don't think my life would be deeply impacted if they proved or disproved the existence of Sasquatch, either.
  5.  (8001.9)
    Nevada: come for the aliens, stay for the gambling.
  6.  (8001.10)
    Well, I live in Nevada, and most people just stay in their own states for Indian casinos, now...
  7.  (8001.11)
    Frankly I think this story of a fake ET. Proval Area 51 is where the U.S. government creates the technologies that America or the world will use tomorrow, especially those for war.
    •  
      CommentAuthorJon Wake
    • CommentTimeJun 18th 2010
     (8001.12)
    Hey, conspiracy theorists: can you think of a single bit of evidence that would disprove your conspiracy?

    What? No? Naw, I didn't think so. But its cute.
    • CommentAuthorStefanJ
    • CommentTimeJun 18th 2010
     (8001.13)
    @Jon: The Men in Black seize or destroy all of the evidence. Including all of the pictures of themselves. EXCEPT THIS ONE!
    LINK BROKEN
    @frequentcontributor: Yeah, but Nevada still has the country's only legal llama brothel.
    • CommentAuthorKosmopolit
    • CommentTimeJun 20th 2010
     (8001.14)
    And everybody knows they moved the aliens to Maine sometime in the early 90's, anyway.


    Rhode Island, actually.
  8.  (8001.15)
    @Kosmopolit @DavidLejeune

    Actually they're in my back garden. Sold a few on eBay as beef jerky. Good results, but the DNA transformation doesn't seem to have worked.

    Seriously though, did anyone really believe that super-advanced grey humanoids had landed on our little planet? Srsly?
  9.  (8001.16)
    @StefanJ I don't know if you did it on purpose or not, but the fact that MIB picture doesn't work makes your post hilarious.
    •  
      CommentAuthorbjacques
    • CommentTimeJun 21st 2010
     (8001.17)
    There's a lot of toxic stuff that you know had to be developed there--stealth paint, fuel for funny-looking aircraft, radioactive material etc.--that it probably made some of the people working there look like decaying aliens. Over the decades, earthbound governments have gotten into enough weird stuff, most of which didn't work, that they make space aliens look like pikers.

    I think the fun went out of it in 1997, the 50th anniversary of the purported UFO crash at Roswell. The town officially turned into a big tourist trap and hung out the "Welcome Space Brothers" sign. The dope-smoking Zeta Grey trance/rave graphics that littered the remainder of the decade didn't help either. Gas music from Jupiter, all of it.

    And why did aliens doing anal probes seem to land only in the US? (Except for that one time in Wales; cf. "Evil Aliens")
  10.  (8001.18)
    This reminded me of one of my favorite military unit patches, This patch is from the 509th Bomb Wing, in charge of the B-2 Stealth Bomber — the 509th used to be based in Roswell, although it has now moved to Missouri. “Gustatus Similis Pullus” translates from Latin as “Tastes Like Chicken.”


    To Serve Man, Tastes Like Chicken
    •  
      CommentAuthorcelan
    • CommentTimeJun 21st 2010
     (8001.19)
    ^"It's a cookbook!"