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    • CommentAuthorSkiriki
    • CommentTimeMay 29th 2010
     (8318.1)
    I'm not sure where to put this, but I'll show it here; a bunch of us international nerds hang together on an IRC channel, and the topic of Eurovision came up early on Saturday morning (Euroside/Aussieside awake, US side still mostly asleep). (Yours truly is Lolth, as that's my other commonly used nick around the Interwebs.)

    Murazor turns off the radio
    <Murazor> Too much Eurovision
    <isomage> what's an eurovision
    LW takes a stab at "bad pop music"
    <Lolth> A ritual yearly combat between various European countries.
    <luc> Supposed to be with "amateur" singers
    <Lolth> Except, instead of guns, flesh and blood, we use music and plastic.
    <Murazor> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXgaOTOCSuU
    <Murazor> bah. English language version
    <LW> :O
    <LW> that is pretty bad
    <Snoof> Eurovision gave us ABBA, so it can't be all bad.
    <Snoof> It is pretty bad, though.
    <Murazor> That's the commonly understood point, LW ^_^
    <LW> fair enough
    <luc> Think my favourite of last year was a country beginning with "L"
    <LW> luctania
    <Lolth> Latveria!
    <Lolth> ...ZOMG :O
    <Lolth> Now THERE is some interesting potential for a Marvel storyline.
    <Snoof> Man, the Latverian Eurovision entry would be awesome.
    <Murazor> Hehee
    <Lolth> Snoof: and imagine, Asgard could also make a claim for a right of participation.

    So...

    What kind of entry Latveria would submit to this yearly contest of humiliation and ritual combat?
  1.  (8318.2)
    A choir singing the praises of Doctor Doom?
    • CommentAuthorSkiriki
    • CommentTimeMay 31st 2010
     (8318.3)
    Let's see the rules... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eurovision_Song_Contest#Rules

    There we go!

    Six artist maximum, three minute song.

    Latveria is not the only country that could make an appearance, I went a-digging for more fictional countries crammed into Earth-616 Europe (going to ignore alternate Earths for now in favor of core universe). o_O I must say, the map looks really interesting as a result of this...

    Kingdom of Symkaria
    Republic of Transia
    Republic of Slorenia
    Slokovia
    Kingdom of Belgriun
    Republic of Carnelia
    Draburg
    Archduchy of Ksavia
    Republic of Morvania
    Republic of Carpasia
    Republic of Rumekistan
    Trebekistan

    Anyway, Latveria's Song Guaranteed to Win Eurovision Song Contest (Because Dr. Doom Says So):

    First of all, I imagine that there would be wholesome girl and boy in late teens, dressed as peasants of the country's history; this is for the rustic nostalgic touch and they're the lead singers; one of them plays a violin too. Then an another pair dressed like high-tech doomtroopers (but don't worry, that armor is totally fake, yessiree) to display all the advances done, thanks to Dr. Doom. One of them plays a guitar, another one deals with the drums. There has to be some kind of science-nerd in a lab coat, and he or she plays bass. And, quite likely there should be some minor Latverian superhero with suitable looks mincing around and doing impressive things.

    Since Eurovision songs are usually diabetically sweet love-songs with co-dependency issues (caaaaan't liiiiive without youuuuuuu), vague sweet-nothings about peace, love and puppies (can't we all be nice to each other?), ethnically nostalgy-laden pieces (I blame Flatley and Riverdance now), and in rare cases, total piss-takes of the contest (Lithuania's entry from couple of years ago comes to mind), and the rules forbid certain types of songs being entered...

    I foresee that the song is going to be a song which presents the proud history of Latveria in the most positive light, and Dr. Doom as a peace-bringer to the region and the world. Lots of peace. Very much peace. And there's probably some scattered Latverian sentences here and there for ethnic color, especially in chorus sections that are shameless paeans to Dr. Doom; I think that those phrases sound innocuous enough to anyone not versed well in the culture, but anyone who knows better can say that they stand for "Dr. Doom will pwn your ass". It starts nicely ethnic and dissolves into some kind of sticky-sweet pop in the end, a transition from history to glorious bright future with lots of Dr. Doom.

    Alternatively, if direct references to Dr. Doom will be verboten due to rules ("The performance and/or lyrics of a song "must not bring the Contest into disrepute"."; after all, Dr. Doom is pretty much a controversial figure everywhere), the propaganda piece will use veiled references instead.
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      CommentAuthormister hex
    • CommentTimeMay 31st 2010
     (8318.4)
    FOOLS! DOOM NEEDS NO SONG TO LAUD HIS GREATNESS!