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[Murray's] quest to become the mayor began on a hot, summer day in July, as he was sipping a latté in a downtown café while snacking on a butter cup and jotting down another classic column on his MacBook Pro. He gestured to the proprietor to put his remaining bits of butter tart in a plastic bag for easy transport (paper itches Steve's skin), but the proprietor morphed into a panhandler before his very eyes, requesting a nickle for the "plastic bag tax." Steve's jaw dropped and his muscles tightened, ready to fight this man to his death. But instead of throwing a classic Murray Haymaker, Steve realized he had to do something bigger, grander, legal. He vowed that day to march down to City Hall and throw his hat in the ring for mayor, since nobody else had his kind of righteous anger, without the distraction of high school football or billion-dollar boondoggles.
