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  1.  (9059.41)
    That sucks, I am so sorry. It happened to me too, last may, and I make some of my $ from photography. Luckily I am blessed with the best friends, family and coworkers ever, and they raised the money for me to replace my camera via paypal. Also, someone from Whitechapel sent me a lens anonymously and I'd still like to find out who it was so I can thank them. Look in pawn shops and see if you local camera store sells used camera bodies. Sell prints as a fundraiser.

    This weekend I am blowing off all my tons of work to watch burlesque shows and terrible bollywood movies and drink. I feel much better. Work is good, too much work is overwhelming and my confidence plummets.

  2.  (9059.42)
    Hello Warren, and Fellow Meatspace Hermits...

    I'm nearing the end of the most tumultuous 2 weeks that I've had in quite awhile. Much of it is chaos, but negatives aside, the eventual result will be a good thing. After surviving and recovering from the post-DragonCon Confluenza, which tried to possess me and swallow my soul for almost all of September, the first 2 weeks of October have brought me the following:

    -Sister had a spot show up at the base of her brain on a CT scan. Mom told me, but I wasn't supposed to know, and therefore couldn't say anything.

    -Same day, roommate/landlord told me that I really needed to be out by this weekend if at all possible, giving me 2 weeks notice, basically. Mind you, I was supposed to be out by the end of September when he was initially planning on putting the house on the market, and had 3 months notice for that. Things got derailed, hence the conversation. There's no ill will on any part here.

    -Next day, I found out that my friend Michael had passed. While not completely unexpected, as he was in poor health, it was still sad. He was diabetic, wasn't taking care of it properly, and a year ago had the lower part of one of his legs amputated.

    -A few days later, sister got results back from MRI, which came back clean. Apparently the spot on the CT scan was a fluke, and her symptoms appear to be attributable changes in meds and their dosage levels.

    -Up until 3 days ago, I was really starting to wonder if I was going to be without a place to stay. Reprieve then availed itself, and it appears I'll be semi-nomadic for a bit while I'm building into more stability.

    So, like I said, negatives aside, the eventual result is a good thing. I've been wanting to live in a place that was a bit more of my own for awhile, and this is a step in that direction. The big issue with this was timing, as monies I've yet to receive due to not being paid for certain things until after they come to publication aren't available yet.

    Where does that put me? Well, I officially move out of here tomorrow, but will still have some things stored here, that I'll retrieve over the next several weeks as I'm able to find places to store them. Then, I spend 2 weeks in north Kansas City as a basement dweller, followed by at least 3 (if not more) weeks in Columbia with a friend. Both locations allow for me to hook my computer up and access the internet, both of which are important to income (without those, I'd be dead in the water, as it would hamper me from finishing various contract work, which would then possibly kill the options of getting recurring work from those companies). While in Columbia, I'll be able to hang out with friends that I haven't been able to hang out with in a very long time. This will make up for the fact that Columbia is a cultural black hole. Maybe.

    When all is said and done, I hope to be capable of being back in KC by late November or early December, or at least be at the point where I'm fiscally capable of sustaining my own place here if I'm not back here yet.

    Sorry for the ramble. You all are probably used to that from me by now... ;)

    As always, thank you for the outlet, and for your hospitality, Internet Forest Man.


    @dot_xom - My friend, that's actually not a bad picture. Trust me when I say that you don't look that chunky. Take into account the fact that you're wearing an untucked shirt, that's a bit loose, and as such, it will be prone to blousing a bit depending on how it sits. In turn, in the photo it's white, against a washed out light gray background, nearly blending into it. Mind you, I don't know what you've looked like in the past, but I guarantee that you're likely in far better shape than several of us here.
    • CommentAuthorCasey Cook
    • CommentTimeOct 16th 2010
    Hello Whitechapel. Things are going good in my little corner of the planet. One of my co-workers left for greener pastures this week, which works out nice for me as I might be getting a promotion as a result. I've also got a new work schedule, Tue-Sat as opposed to the Fri-Mon schedule I had. Still on the night shift and 5 days instead of 4, but the shifts are shorter which means more time at home with the wife in the evenings. It's also nice that after 5 months I have gotten used to sleeping during the day.

    On Monday we had plumbers out to fix the drain pipes coming off of the house. The job was cheaper than I expected and we celebrated with long showers the rest of the week. The money leftover from the plumbing job has been converted into a shiny new Macbook for the wife, whose old PC was on its last legs. She's very happy with it, which makes me happy.

    The next two days will constitute my new weekend, and I will spend it moving into the larger of our two computer workstations, now vacated as the result of the Macbook acquisition. This will be good as I have totally outgrown the other desk and have monitor stands hanging off either side.

    Cheers Warren on the success of RED this weekend!

    Picture of me at Sun Studio Memphis last year after a recording session with the band-

    • CommentTimeOct 16th 2010
    Ultra Fan Attack!
    Ultra Jump Rope/Lasso thing ...

    We're pricing the tot's 5th birthday party... She wears me down. We just watched the 2nd to Last and Last Ultraman movie ... it's a phase. I get very sentimental when they roll out the original actors for the 60's TV show for cameos.

    Deep in my mind is the thought I must become a publisher ...
    • CommentAuthordot_xom
    • CommentTimeOct 17th 2010

    Heh. Thank you for the kind words. Whether I'm actually a chubby fella or not, it is time I started getting in shape anyway. I enjoyed modeling for my friend, even if it was for shits and giggles, so if any of my other photog friends come a-callin', I'd rather be in the right condition to strut my stuff for them too. If it's any indication, here's another pic my friend shot with her other camera:
    morning cigarette
  3.  (9059.46)
    I'm in San Francisco. This week I've also been in Manhattan and Portland. I'm spending the night on Alcatraz tomorrow. It's been one of those kind of weeks.

    Tonight had the sort of surreality you only get when you introduce your IRL friends and colleagues to the people you know from the alt-porn websites you frequent. (By
    "people" I mean "models.")

    "How do you know her?" "I've seen her stuff things up her butt on the internet."*

    * That conversation did not actually take place. Though it could have.
    • CommentTimeOct 17th 2010
    @brandon.... this is relative to my interests....
    • CommentAuthorroadscum
    • CommentTimeOct 17th 2010
    Annoying really, when i'm in the mood for writing i don't have the time, when i have the time i'm too tired to think and when i notice it's saturday night open mic time it's already sunday and time is getting on.

    My congratulations to the young Master Ellis on his cinematic success, i will happily be his shambling henchthing, gibbering insanely while i crank the wheels to open the orbital death ray hanger doors.

    I am toying with the idea of starting a blog, more as a device for practising my somewhat atrophied writing skills than anything else. But that's as may be..

    So, did my good deed for the year on friday and picked up a pair of really quite sweet girlie hitchers who were stuck in a layby on the A30 down near Exeter.

    Nice, arty, middle class and more than a bit hippy, they'd fit in well here. I did mention the Master's name a few times and mutter about my fondness for his work and his forthcoming cinematic thing just to steer them in the right direction. Not of course that i think everyone here is nice, middle class and a bit hippy, before you start releasing the eels, i just fumble a bit with my words these days.

    They seemed sound and well grounded if a little less concerned about the potential hazards of being stuck in a layby in the middle of nowhere than they might have been. They patiently listened to my incoherent ramblings all the way back to the Fragrant Picturesque Jewel of the East (with a brief stop in Salisbury for dins and delivery of stuff). I dropped them safely at a petrol station in Barking with directions to the station and a vague warning that it's not the 99% of people who are nice that are the problem, it's the 1% who aren't that you have to watch out for. I dunno, maybe i'm getting (more) paranoid in my old age.

    And now i have to rush to be ready to go down to Crystal Palace with a friend and her achingly sweet little 3 year old daughter to feed the dinosaurs and have my shoulder cried on.
  4.  (9059.49)
    I think this is the second time I've missed one of these on Saturday because I was so distracted. Things have been getting better for me. Also for my mom, which makes me happy, because I hate to see her all stressed out and a mess. I still feel very impatient about my winter clothes being hidden away in the pole barn. My creativity seems to be coming back, which is pretty huge, because it's been more or less on hiatus for a good chunk of the year. I'm very much looking forward to Halloween and then cutting my hair off whether I have a buyer or not. I might even do some self portraits in the near future. I am very frustrated with the weight I can't seem to lose however. Still, things are generally good.

    I still more or less look like this though: