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  1.  (9982.1)
    All right. You’ve Told Me Of You, and it is Good. Keep it coming, if you haven’t already – record your splendidosity on the scoreboard of Yes.

    As you’ve almost certainly figured-out, I’m building myself a little reference library here, before getting stapled full-time onto the community. To stick to the pub analogy, a bloke can’t expect the regulars to buy him drinks if he doesn’t even know their bloody names. (There’s no messageboard equivalent of being gouged in the mantit by a shatterproof alcopop-bottle, but still – I hate drinking alone.)

    So let’s make things a bit more interesting.


    A lot of you folks have been part of this thriving, healthy, dynamic community for a long time – lovely lovely pissheads, the lot of you. Others have been on the outskirts paying close attention, like beer-rapists in waiting. They’re lovely too, and I hope we can entice them to pipe-up. Either way, in all that time, I’d hope others have made a strong impression on you at least once or twice. Right? Right.

    So tell me about your fellow blethernauts. Who’s got the biggest gob? Who’s always ready with the Sticky Wee of Wisdom? Who’s reliably reasonable? Who’s made you laugh so hard you had to do the Hasty Bathroom Waddle? Who’s moved you, and how?

    WHAT I WANT: One-line character sketches, anecdotes, boozy recollections. [Imagine that the arrival of my glorious digital gonad has accidentally annihilated every other user; your job is to briefly obituarise your favourite corpses before the electroherpes nixes you too.]

    WHAT I DON’T WANT: Insults, grudge-bearing, scab-pickery. This is your chance to say excellent things about excellent peers; not an open-entry shitfling for pissy little children. Stirrers will be sent home without their car-keys.

    WHAT I ALSO DON’T WANT: People sulking or getting arsey because they haven’t been mentioned. Doesn’t matter, folks: this isn’t about spiritual validation or backslappery. Stepping-up and telling us all about someone else – thereby proving you’re a listener as much as a talker – is just as Awesome to me as being described by others as Really And Actually Awesome.

    Good? Good. Go.

    [I think… yeah… let’s allow small pictures this time, as long as they’re relevant.]
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011
    As mentioned before, a ton of 'chapelers write for my website, or release tracks on my label. I've managed to meet up with Ginja, Will Couper and a few others in real life too, at a talk Warren gave in Dundee, which was awesome. I've bought amazing pictures from Oldhat, which now adorn my walls. I follow the adventures of Fauxhammer, Icelandbob and a few others diligently online. And most recently, I met up with Sneak046 and got wasted!! Which was awesome. Evidence:

    Sneak n Tex
  2.  (9982.3)
    Any "worst xxx" thread (roommates, girlfriends, jobs, ext) wouldn't be complete without Govspy's antics. Either he is an amazing bullshit artist or lives a damn entertaining (for me, the guy not in the middle of it) life. For the record, I probably owe him a couple of beers.
    • CommentAuthorKradlum
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011
    PatrickBrown writes and illustrates a great webcomic over at
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011
    This is an incomplete list of people who seem to tentpole the threads that I spend most of my time here in. There are certainly others who should be noted in here that I'm forgetting (my apologies to you wonderful deviants who have slipped my mind), but these names seem to pop up regularly with reliably good content.

    Lemon Laser Betty, taphead, and greasemonkey all stand out to me as consistently delivering the goods to the Around the Net thread (which I hope sticks around, because I like having a fresh supply of handpicked weirdness).

    Iceland Bob, Joe.distort, nigredo, and †3X†UR3 are notable for their contributions to any threads of a musical bent. I know there are regulars from the Book Club thread, but I'm having trouble remembering any names at the moment.

    And I always enjoy the artistic efforts of Paul Sizer, mojokingbee, dorkmuffin, Rachæl Tyrell, COOP, oldhat, and valente.

    There are a lot of people who don't necessarily seem to have a main hangout, but are always around making things better and stranger, like Oda, 256, mybrainhurts, chris g, lampcommander, etc. The list goes on and on. I've never seen a digital pub with so many entertaining barflys.
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011 edited
    Sadly I don't have much time, but I WILL be back on here to post about more people. In the meantime...

    †3X†UR3 is a really nice guy who was the first one to give me a photography feature on his web site, Weaponizer, when I was first starting out. This helped raise my confidence and move towards Career Mode with what I do. On top of that, he's an incredible musician and really gives a shit about bringing notice to artists, writers and musicians to the public eye.

    Dorkmuffin and Oda both have the direct line to the part of my brain that makes me smile. Dork is an incredibly talented artist whose work I want on my walls and in-person meetings have shown we make a hell of a good team. Oda I think would be the best drinking buddy in the world. I definitely want to put on a snazzy dress and paint the town with her.

    Icelandbob is a music-finding god of some sort. Seeing him develop has been such a treat. Well, it's all in here on a post he did about his time on Whitechapel.

    Rachæl Tyrell will most likely shy away at being called it, but she's been a heavy inspiration for me. Her actions inspired me to start selling prints way back when and I learned how to better channel my emotions in to my work better thanks to her. She taught me that the line between artist and art can be pretty blurred and for that I owe her a huge debt.

    taphead is an incredibly talented musican who just happens to be one incredibly hot man from Finland. His music, both as Taphead and the band Älymystö has been the soundtracks to many nights. On top of this he has a never ending supply of encouragement.

    Right, that's all for now. But if it's okay I will be back to post some more.
  3.  (9982.7)

    SIzer, for starters. You can usually count on him to contribute slick, professional artwork to any of the art threads. He's picked up some pretty decent paying gigs through the exposure he's gotten here, too.

    Mr Hex is the life of every party, an inveterate drunkard and disturbingly fond of Jack Kirby. Toronto meet-ups are dull without him.

    Other standout artists include Edwin, Kperkins, Mojokingbee, Hey Apathy and Amalgamated Biscuit.

    Oldhat and FC are both excellent photographers, and I've had the pleasure of their company on various Toronto meet-ups.

    Coop, of course, who is an old hand at pretty much everything artistic.

    Govspy and IcelandBob entertain consistently with their wild stories.
      CommentAuthorAlan Tyson
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011
    The people I feel best-qualified to tell you about are the blokes from the more-or-less-weekly Skype nights, and now the Turntable nights.

    Sean is a constant source of subtle hilarity, and his rendition of a back-woods, deep-fried Kentucky Optimus Prime is something that must be heard to be believed.

    Rootfirember, or just Roo, is... well, she frightens me sometimes. In a good way. Her cats are her minions and familiars, and they have killed men.

    Britannica is an absolute blast to talk bullshit with, and she is a sure and stylish hand with a Turntable DJ mix.

    Glukakke is a dangerous, wonderful woman. That is all that need be said on the matter.

    Andre is the sexiest Brazilian alive. He's also a burgeoning filmmaker, and he's got one of the sharpest wits of anyone I know, in meatspace or the ethertubes.

    I will be meeting Greasemonkey, Robin, and Mr. Hex in a couple of weeks. I am very intimidated by their awesomeness, and suspect full exposure to their combined coolosity shall send me into a coma.

    Govspy, whom I have not had the please to talk with in real time, has (as has been stated, but cannot be stressed enough) not only an unending collection of hilarious and heartbreaking stories, but the instincts of a raconteur with which to tell them.
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011 edited
    Let's see...

    I've bought a print from oldhat (NYC graffiti) and a comic from Jon Wake (Virtuoso), and although I've argued/been scolded by both at different points I ain't madattem. I deserved to be chastised, because I don't think before I say/type/do.

    My favorite Whitechapelers are Andre (for his excellent but now defunct webcomic Pitch Black), Internaut (for being an Internaut), and someone who isn't here anymore called orwelleseyes who always talked politics and was full of wisdom.

    But they're all good people. Except for Warren Ellis. The common folk say he lays with demons and is the direct root of the arse eel plague.
      CommentAuthormister hex
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011 edited
    Let's see -

    OLDHAT is awesome, a great photog, a wonderful person, VERY sexy but with that hint of danger, in that she could beat you up if she chose.

    GREASEMONKEY is a great mate, a fine artist, with a fine wife. He makes a great host, makes great fettucine, an excellent raconteur and he shoots fireworks off his balcony once he's had a skinful.

    LUCIEN is deadly cool, possibly the deepest, finest voice I've ever had the pleasure of hearing. He's wonderfully cynical and he likes comics.

    PETER KELLY is both a gentleman and a scholar. Also, he likes booze and is not shy about it.

    FC is a great photographer and I think I scare her a bit. (I ... have that effect on people.)

    ICELANDBOB was recently voted the Coolest Guy Around.

    ODDBILL has beautiful eyes.

    EDIT - SPEAKING OF EYES - I also miss Orson (orwelleseyes) and hope he's well, wherever he is. And Looneynerd was always one of my favorites.
    • CommentAuthorDarkest
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011
    I'm really bad at the whole communicating with people bit and I don't really feel comfortable talking about people I haven't had X amount of conversation with (I assume it has something to do with having Asperger Syndrome). So I shall take the easy way out and say...

    All the people who answered my thread about opening my Comic Shop.
      CommentAuthorHEY APATHY!
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011 edited
    The bloke's at the artist's thread table are all incredible people. The amazing artworks and friendships I discovered there got me through a really shitty winter:

    Valente-zen master extraordinaire, Mojokingbee- super social prolific pens, imaginarypeople - mind bogglingly weird, Pupato- one trippy mother, Mercurialblonde - a brilliant expressionist and brilliant person, lordofthejungle- ROAR! JPStargazer- amazing mind and amazing lines, amalgamated biscuit- non-stop belly aches, Greasemonkey - seizure inducing psychedelics!!! kylelatino- keeps posting old covers he finds in the bargain bins claiming them as his own but we forgive him anyhow (HA) also miss lomopop's creepy pictures but she hasn't posted for awhile and well everyone else who hangs out there that I might have forgot, it's a really cool table.

    lurking around or outside of that table

    Oldhat- whom I met in person now twice in the past three days, a very strong character indeed
    icelandbob- amazing DJ in the listening thread
    the mightyfoamhead whose posts I avoid at all cost due to the extensive psychological damage they are certain to inflict
    andrenavarro the first chaplain to really impress me with his opinions/writing skills when I joined a couple of years ago

    and Paul Duffield who has been exceptionally cool about answering questions and sharing his insights with us fanboys regardless of his royal lineage
  4.  (9982.13)
    I forgot to mention the other Toronto Whitechapelers with whom I've been drinking at different times -

    Peter Kelley, middle manager extraordinaire with a raft of funny stories, not the least of which is the one about the co-worker jerking off in his chair.

    Lucien, the only man I know who can get cut off at the bar while stone sober.

    Redwynd, a somewhat quiet young fellow who enjoys his comics and his drink.
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011 edited
    Definitely want to give props or whatever the kids are giving out nowadays to the regular Skype crowd: Alan Tyson, Rootfireember, Sean, Glukkake, and Andre Navarro. I don't just get to be silly for no reason anymore, except when we're playing Mad Libs or doing dramatic readings of shitty fanfic or yelling about kitties and/or Gary Busey over VoIP. It's very nice, and very much appreciated.
    Others that have been wonderful people, in general and sometimes even to me: oldhat, Rachel Tyrell, Sneak046, Chris G, Ricochet, joe_distort, Cameron Callahan...(ETA: ...oh, and icelandbob, and texture, and atavistian, and tanuki, and Mark Seifert, and zoetica, and I may just have to take the "and everyone else" route eventually)
    And, while he's never really posted on the board all that much, and he's murdered all computers in his possession at the moment, VKlaus is probably the best friend I have from Whitechapel('s IRC room). He's the one guy from these internets that I've met in person, and he's as cool as I could have hoped.
    • CommentTimeJun 30th 2011
    I know it's bland to say well, hell, everyone! But my very favorite thing about Whitechapel is how every person here tends to speak up about the stuff they're into with conviction and attraction. Not everyone is wanting to make art, write, whatever; but you guys take on your various projects without irony, self-consciousness or pessimism. Maybe that's just how it reads. My instinct is to be risk averse and if I make plans I often try to leave room for landing on my ass when everything goes pear shaped here. Past failures notwithstanding, I love that people here dive into the next thing at the very least for the sheer pleasure of doing it. It's gotten me moving forward and I can't understate how much of an influence you've all been.

    Ok, specifics (this is maybe why I get so few drinks courtesy other people, I remember personalities, I don't tend to remember to pay attention to names). Icelandbob is simply a doll, brilliant with the music as everyone has said, but just also personable and fun. Oldhat: creative, cute and snarky in perfect measure. Seantaclaus: good bloke who tweets the most brilliant food he makes at one am; also has been willing to IM with me when I'm in an emotional tangle. Rachael Noel: Ridiculously talented and eagerly jumps into new projects because no one told her she couldn't. Glukkake: All of these, plus some. Got to meet her in NYC, been in awe of her willingness to jump at new opportunities, to push herself, and oh by the way, to be totally welcoming of strangers. DavidLejeune (sp?) was cool to meet at the Worst Kuchie weiner place in East LA and MikiM was likewise a hell of a treat. I look forward to Trini_Naenae's posts on SNOMs. Dunno if she knows that, but she looks out for other people and that's sweet and I think sometimes have the same issues with trying to deal with hurdles and brain chemistry, though we lead very, very different lives.

    Um yeah. I know I'm leaving out a ton of brilliant people. I really apologize. Thanks for being Whitechapel, everyone.
    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2011 edited
    The Torontonians have received a lot of love, and they deserve it. About a year ago while visiting family in Buffalo, I dropped a message here that I was driving up to Toronto for a day and wondered if anyone would want to meet for a drink.

    This resulted in:

    Oldhat being talked into buying a book about Jack Parsons, physicist and occultist. This is the best thing about Robin - she is interested in all sorts of incredible weirdness, and you wave a book about a possibly Satan worshiping rocket engineer at her, she will snap it right up. She also takes pictures of MURDER!

    FC sharing stories about designing assets for Second Life. Did you know she does that? She is also an intrepid Urban Explorer. Also one of the best band photographers I've ever seen.

    Mister Hex threatening to stab anyone's gums with a screwdriver should they express sympathy with Stan lee in the meta Ur-conflict of Marvel Comics. Mister Hex possesses a fine bicycle, and is an authority on bookstores and bars in the greater Toronto area. He apparently loves Coronation Street. And Jack Kirby. But neither so much as his bicycle.

    Peter Kelley describing his adventures in digitizing reels and reels of deteriorating footage from the old TV show Road to Avonlea. He came by what was apparently the last set of functioning equipment that could accomplish this task, and had it languishing in his garage or basement or something. When it came time to prepare the beloved Canadian little-house-on-the prairie style family classic for DVD release, there was only one man in all Canada with the technology for the job. At least, that is how the story has been elaborated in my head.

    Together, the five of us drank many beers, then shopped for comics drunk at midnight, because it was Canada and you're allowed to do that up there. To see all the fine individuals described above in action you can consult the epic two page thread chronicle right here.

    And though sadly I was not able to meet her on that visit, I can speak highly of the taste and intelligence of Allana, also Canadian, with whom, as a result of a conversation begun here in a book Club thread, I shared a live blogging of a mutual reading of The Difference Engine. She is a brilliant conversationalist, able to weave thoughts skillfully through posts, small essays, chat logs and photo & art choices, and is the sort of person who can deliberately approach a work of art from a point of view diametrically opposed to the one she would natrually take, just to see if there was anything new to be discovered thereby.

    The Internet's Own David LeJeune is one of my local Angelino Whitechaplain compatriots, though he is departing for Phoenix soon for employment reasons, so we can't hold that against him. He is a fine fellow whom I have met in person at the Wurstkuche and points downtown, as razrangel above has mentioned.

    razrangel herself is also an interesting person - she is currently pursuing a voiceover career and Japanese as a second language, both at the same time!

    Also, MikiM is an engaging and adventurous person, who recently appeared in Los Angeles from up in the mountains somewhere. Some say she has not aged in a thousand years, and is known among bears in their dream-language as the Clawbreaker. She has come down to the big city to solve crimes and be puzzled by our modern ways. Some of what I just said is true, but I'll leave it to her to disavow what she'd rather not have you believe. She told us a disturbing story about a piece of ornamental metal being consumed by her flesh in an unexpected way. That is absolutely true. She recovered.

    One of my favorite Whitechaplains who I haven't met in person is Argos. She is a San Diegan Burner who hoops, rocks a surprising variety of increasingly awesome hair styles, and gives good tweet. I predict she will be a force to be reckoned with in the years to come. She's like a Mad Max villain in a larval stage. When civilization collapses, Argos will rule Bartertown.

    That's all only who I can think of at the moment. So many wonderful people here. I'll add my regards as well for Orwellseyes and Looneynerd, who both enriched us with much real knowledge in conversations that, elsewhere on the web, are usually dominated by stubborn ignorance. These two have the science.

    I'll probably be back to this thread to sing the praises of others soon.
    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2011 edited
    @Mister Hex/Oddbill - so I'm not the only one who misses orwellseyes' postings (and hopes he is doing ok..), Looneynerd is over on twitter and tumblr (his day in history posts are always interesting to read)


    †3X†UR3 is a bad influence. And I love him for it. He also is an awesome maker of noiz

    ICELANDBOB should not be trusted around kittens or small children. Because they make him go all squiffy. Which is not a good look for a Scottish rugby loving mid-thirties fella...

    GINJA keeps me sharp. He is a mental whet-stone.


    FAUXHAMMER - Agent of H.A.T.E

    BRIT - doesn't know how cool she is.

    GEKKO - Style Icon. His SPIT posts always make me jealous for his sartorial suaveness.

    TAPHEAD - culinary genius. Musician. Dude.

    ODA - Sends out lovely xmas cards. In March.


    Will leave it there, but if I haven't mentioned anyone I apologise - you are all a bunch of awesome/scary/magnificent humans, honestly.
    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2011 edited
    I've a generally good opinion of a most people on here. I ewon't even try to list everyone, though, I can't even remember names and encounters in real life, let alone on the internet. I'm only intermittently in IRC - remember when it was still an in-window chat? I have this hilarious screencap from back then. (EDIT: in context, that followed a poll on the relative nudity of the room and a lengthy discussion of the ethics and naming conventions of robotfucking.)

    I have since gleaned many historical tidbits from LooneyNerd and some excellent vodka from Tanuki. I am also a fan of Oldhat's photography, AndreNavarro's ridiculous face* and Ruzkin's solidarity in highly embarrassing cyberpunk draft snippets. *waves*

    *(xD sorry mate I figured the talent could be taken as read)
    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2011
    I'm fucking horrible at these; I'm always neurotic I'm going to leave somebody off. It's like Follow Friday with more characters to use failing!

    Anyway: T3xtur3 (I can't be arsed to find the cross button), Neil Ford, Oldhat, Dorkmuffin, Sneak046, Andre Navarro, Seantaclaus, UncouthRooth, Oda, IcelandBob, Cat Vincent, Brittanica, and Rootfireember are all people I consider my Whitechapel aces. Plus more, but I'm shitting myself in mortal social terror that I slighted somebody.
      CommentAuthorcity creed
    • CommentTimeJul 1st 2011
    Can easily back all of the above (namers and named) as WC legends.
    There's a few people not mentioned whose contributions I've found particularly entertaining, challenging and provocative of the brain bits over the years:
    Verus, Kosmopolit and Finagle don't post nearly enough these days for my liking.
    There's obviously many more. (hastily purchases omission insurance)