I walked down by the river today, to see what had become of my childhood, only to find the hidden paths covered by sculpted hills and landscaped trees, or swaths of pale gray cement, and winding metallic stairways.
No sign of the loons. They're long-gone, gone when the construction started, fled like I did. Perhaps it was the only sensible thing to do. There are no tracks of rabbits in the snow, no tracks of deer, or raccoon or skunk. Only small birds and the occasional squirrel, and the tracks of people's pet dogs and their boots as they tromp along the clean, pristine walkways.
It does not feel like home, not like the place I went in anger or sorrow, to hide from the world, even during winter storms so bad I could hardly feel my fingers through gloves.
Gone. Gone are the twists of the river I knew, where loons nested and crawdads basked, ducks swam and the herons hunted. Replaced by tourist-friendly sculpted river rocks that never belonged here. Gone is the tree that was the childhood way of crossing the river (thankgod our parents never found THAT out), replaced by iron bridges painted rust-red.
The cops now want people to use the pathways, instead of chasing people away. They say things will be better now. They say it will bring tourists and money, this pale pathway I wandered, as if covering everything with pavement and fake wilderness made from stones of cement made to look 'natural' are a replacement for what was. A fake wilderness.
Very few will notice the difference. Very few will care.
So. I just got a gasmask... People keep on asking me why I have it, and looking at me expectantly. It's like they expect me to have a practical, mundane, every-day-use for a gasmask up here in Michigan.
Why did I get one? BECAUSE.
editing to add a LINK to a pic I edited of me in the gasmask. I deleted the eye lens things and then promptly scared the crap out of me. hahaha. Image removed because I've sufficiently spread my fear of my own editing. ;)
Furnace did not blow up because the fanbelt was fubar'd. It's currently turned off and not fixed because G. decided to watch tv instead. Come tonight, I expect it to be cold as all hell again, and my area to be the only really warm part, because I have my space heater instead of being in the area that normally gets heat.
I'm feeling a bit better thanks to peach flavor kefir (The store had !!6 !!flavors instead of a choice of blueberry or plain. WOOT), and a turkey wrap from the local hippie co-op, got my homework done and am waiting for monday, when my new stylus for my iDevice is to appear in the mail. Edit: Furnace fixed. YAY!
Burned paper trash today, and helped heat up my area of the house, as well. Take that, junkmail and old bad drawings! I also thought it might be interesting to try to take pics of said firescapes, and got a bunch of rather interesting textured images that don't really LOOK like fire to me, but *shrugs* I like 'em anyhow. I like how in this one you can see the flowery-shape of the curling tongue of flame, and a hint of the texture of the paper being burned (That's over 500 monopoly money $1's, that were given to a coworker for a 'tip' which got passed onto me).
...with the fury and talent of a five year old. I'm getting better, though. On the job training and what not. If you'd like, you can have 16 pages of childish comics starring robots and tentacley monsters. Just click the cover, it links directly to a PDF.
It has some stories from my first two print comics as well as some that were first available else where.